Noob

It's been long. Ironically I've been logging in this blog everyday to check for updates. But the funny thing is, if i don't update myself how would my readers come and update?? Anywayz, this is gonna be a long one.

First week after my internship start. Feelings? NOOB. I'm being a noob in the office. Everyone seems to have something to do or a task to complete. But as for me, I'm not even clear of what I should do. My supervisor already given me a rough description of what I 'm suppose to do. But the question is, how should I do it? Believe me I've tried to ask my task in hand for more details and I just get the same answer from my supervisor. He probably thinks I'm an idiot or something. Each time I walked out of my office and normally I take a look on other people's room, if someone is chatting they'll sure talk about technical stuff. Otherwise if they're alone, they'll probably doing something serious. I felt like I'm not contributing to the company at all. Yes yes, maybe I'm still new here, but still I should do something!@!!

My supervisor is quite young, but he is smart. There's one weakness I found from him. He's too nice to me. First of all, with my work performance like this, a normal supervisor would have scolded me already. 2ndly, whenever he ask me question, and I struggle to answer, he'll just say nevermind, wtf?? Also , he doesn't push me at all. Maybe later I'll be hell busy. But right now, I can only summarize what I've learned so far - office slacker!! Well I was a slacker before i start work, and now my status is office slacker. The difference is that previously I don't have to wake up blardy early in the morning and stay a wake from 7am - 6pm, which also gives me more reason to drink coffee.

Anyway, I hope this situation doesn't las long. A lil updates about my personal life. Since new year till I start my internship, I've been playing dota alot. Well some of you had me misunderstood. I don't hate Dota nor the players. Previously I didn't wanted to start when I was back in msia though I've been invited few times. There're couple of reasons for that. Firstly when I'm back for holidays, I definitely want to spend more time doing things I can't do in Germany. Gaming is not one of it. 2ndly, to go to cafe and waste money there, I would rather spend on other things. 3rdly, I don't wanna be a noob in cafe causing my own teammates to lose. I don't hate people that talk about dota either. The only thing I hate is people to talk about dota at the wrong timing. Even now that I've started playing, I don't talk about dota when I'm with someone who doesn't play. It's like when I'm in a canteen sitting with a chinese friend and also a European friend, the Chinese fren tend to speak just Chinese which will make my European friend unable to join our conversation. Get the whole point??

Nothing much to update about myself actually. The others remain the same. I'm still single but not looking for one. Still doing the same things when I'm free, i.e Rubik cube, computer games, drama, guitar getting less but still take out and strum once in a bluemoon. The huge difference is that I sleep at 10.30/11pm everyday and wake up 7.25am everyday. That was a milestone achievement for me since college in 2004. 4 years of screwed up biological clock finally being restored. Unfortunately, it is weekends and my determination will be weak! So back to 5-2/4-1 theory(sleep at 4/5am wake up 1/2pm).

Well, I know I've not been a good person. I know I've been mistreating some people. I'm still much a coward. Everytime I face a problem, I would prefer to run away from it. I've talked to people about relationships, as one of my biggest failures in life is relationship. But I guess I am right to back off. Focus on other stuff. For now, I couldn't complain much of what i've lost. I am sad, but I am not gonna be this way anymore.

Cheerz, hope to update more soon.