First blood....

One week since I am in Germany for the 2nd time. If i have to describe the feeling in one sentence, I would say it was far more difficult than the first time I was here emotionally. Way back in January this year where most of our classmates were looking for an internship/thesis attachment, I decided to be different by looking further west, mainly Germany. At that time of course most companies are just recovering from recession and it was difficult.

I was lucky, or perhaps my German background, that I was called up for an interview with Franhofer Institute in Germany. I had a great feeling about the interview despite being a little bit slumber here and there, but I didn't get it in the end. I remember that I was kinda disappointed as my hopes were high, and that week itself darling came to visit me and I nearly screw up the whole trip. Then came 2 offer from Singapore, which is not really an offer. It is more like them looking for people to fill up their empty seats. I got one of the position which basically doesn't gives me the thing I want. Despite being quite reluctant, I have to take since no other offer came.

Out of no where at the end of April, I got this offer from Bosch, Germany. I was so excited as Bosch is pretty well known and the project was very interesting. I am excited to go back to Germany again. I have made so much sacrifice, and effort just to get to Germany. I have also spent unnecessary expenses just because I am coming back here.

So now I am finally here, and I was and still quite depressed. Last week was a disaster, I cried almost everyday while thinking of the time i spent in Malaysia/Singapore. I had such a wonderful 2 months holiday back home. Maybe just too wonderful that I have forgotten all my engineering enthusiasm and just felt maybe I am kinda sick of technical stuff. Although I seldom cry now, but I am still quite emotional whenever I am not doing anything and I am alone. I am always alone for now since I don't have any friends around here yet other than my colleagues. They are of course not here during weekends and even their here, it's not so clicking especially due to language barrier.

Anyway, I guess it will be back to me and bloggie again for the near future. So I guess I would update more often this time.

I would like to end this post with a dedication to my dearest baby. She have been extremely wonderful in my life. During the two months, despite also having some down times, the overall outcome was just so great. She did alot for me throughout the two months and also my preparation for Germany. She bought me some necessities knowing that i need it here. I don't know how she felt, but to me the greatest highlight of the whole holiday was finally the acceptance and the meeting of my parents. It has always been a burden to me but finally it has been resolve. She was also the one that gave me strength to hold on to my feet and move forward during my first few days in Germany. She called me and sms me eventhough it's blardy damn expensive just to make sure I am okay. She emailed me and gave me words of encouragement which is just priceless. I am finally able to be okay especially when I'm in office, and I really thank her alot. I know it's just promises now, but i guaranty that I will love her more and treat her better in the future, give her all that she needs and all the she wants!