失恋, or Lovelorn

Those who know chinese, will definately know the exact meaning of 失恋. I can't find an english word for it, except lost of love? But when i translate it in google, I found this world lovelorn. It might be funny to you guys who've already known this word for long time. But don't laugh at me, though I'm relatively good in English, but I've lots of vocab that i don't know about it. I mean even my grammer sux most of the time.

Ok back to the topic. Most people will think, that lovelorn occurs after a break up. But that's just the smallest bit of understanding. I've broke up 4 times already, does that mean I 失恋 for 4 times? Nah I don't think so. The way I understand things, 失恋 happen when you finally realize that the person you love, doesn't love you anymore. Or you realize that you're in love with someone but the someone doesn't love you. Break up can mean alot of things, maybe the reason for break up is because of some problems between both of them, but that doesn't mean they get lovelorn because they might still have feelings, just so misunderstanding that can cause the break up. The major difference is that breakup is an incident but lovelorn is an emotion.

After my recent break up, I never felt lovelorn because I knew the reason for breaking up is for both sides to be good. I might be wrong, but I strongly believe that the person I love still have strong feeling on me. That's why I never felt lovelorn, I only felt lonely. But now, I really felt the feeling of lovelorn, due to some "signals" send by the other person. You know our reaction is always based on our first instinct. For example, if you're English educated person, and you accidentally knocked a German(you know the language), you'll find that the first word you say is sorry instead of Entschuldigung. You can find lots of reason/excuses for denying what your first instinct is, but that's the fact. And usually instinct comes from the heart.

I guess nobody will understand how i feel, and so do i. I just wish I can be emotionless at this point. But in opposite, my emotion is getting richer now. Anywayz,

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone who visited my blog.