bleeding

I'm hurting so badly now and nothing i do seems to stop the "bleeding". I wasn't prepare for this at all, not since long ago. I really don't know what to do now. I can't sleep. I can't be happy. I just can't get myself on the feet. And i can't control my tears. Its been wetting my whole pillow now. I have no mood to do anything at all. When I watch movies I'll remember the time we spent in cinema, when i facebook, i rmb how we exchange msg n post. when i blog, i just rmb how i select which photos to put up. even when i turn on my comp, i just have the tendency to turn on my picasa n browse through those pics, but those pics are like poison to me making my heart hurt even more. I just don't know what else i can do. I stare at the phone every now and then, just to realize nothing is happening there. It hurts, so badly. I look back at July last year, we set a goal. Short term, and when everything's over it's going to be real bright. It is not happening. I am going to break down soon. I just can't help crying and crying. Just six more weeks to go. its never reaching.