Congrats to the Malaysian team for winning the AFF cup. I always love criticizing the under performed Malaysian team in all sports on world class stages, doesn't matter if it's ASEAN or world wide. Deep down in me, I still support them whenever they show hopes of winning it. Of course, No sportsman should've been awarded a title no matter what stage they won. Sports and politics should be separated by clean line.
Back to what I want to talk about. New year is coming real soon and the resolution post will be hopefully done either on the eve or next year. This post, its about gadgets and stuffs that i wish to have by end of next year. Well, I'm almost graduating already and hopefully my job hunt will be a smooth one. Doesn't matter where I end up working, I suppose I will have a salary that allows me to spend one way or the other. Else I'd save up for these target anywayz. Lets begin.
1. Facial Treatment
Crucial for me. Don't need to look handsome, just want to get rid of my pimples thats all. Facial can cost quite a bit, perhaps around few thousand ringgit?
2. Dental "face lift"
Its been a while I've been to a dental clinic and I know I have some ugly teeth and some unhealthy ones that I need a clean up. Estimated also around few thousand I guess.
3. Camera
Will not wipe out the possibility of DSLR, but would prefer those such as Panasonic GF-1 or the one from Sony. Another few thousand?
4. Ipad --- Competitors
My host had a collection of apple products and one of them is an Ipad. Of course I find it kinda cool and it was kinda interactive as we played Need for Speed together with him using Iphone and me using Ipad. I personally would prefer to play games with real hardcore processing machine like the console or PC, but it would be kinda fun if you host somebody and just let them play this kinda games with just tilting the device left or right. Know what i mean? Nothing against Apple though but I always felt Apple is charging too much for the amount of specs they put in and the limited programmability. Apple apps are cool and large variety of it, but nah I don't fancy those. I fancy the hardware and the ability to customize much more than what apple restricted. ASUS EEE tablet is one of those that I think might have a great potential.
5. Windows phone 7 based Smartphones
Again, why no iphone? again same reason as above. Limited hardware resources but charged a high price plus limited programmability. I fancy the idea of smartphones and being an electronic majored engineer, I understand quite abit of the inside and hence, i am not a big fan of iphone. Please, understand me. I don't hate apple, just prefer value for money gadgets.
6. IEM Earphones
My Shure is going to Kaputt totally. In fact its no longer pleasant to use it anymore as the cable is kinda loose now. So its time for a replacement. Ultimate Ears, Shure, Klipsch, Etymotic, erm what else? Whichever that sound nice. This should be the cheapest among the wish list. Say around 100Euro?
7. HD Media Player.
Assuming I have somehow a flat panel, doesn't matter if its Plasma or LCD or LED or 3D. Doesn't matter how many inch (minimum 25" la....at least a computer monitor). So, I would have a big collection of HD movies in a digital format. Of course I need an encoder to play it. I'm eyeing on the Western Digital one. Say around RM800?
8. Membership to a sports club
I don't know where I'd be working so I don't know what kinda sports club I'm talking here. But definitely it must have a swimming pool, sauna, basketball court or badminton or football or tennis. Gym is an added advantage, with instructor that would be icing on the cake.
9. Semi-acoustic Guitar & Lessons
Yes I might be a little old and I already have a guitar. But I'm still so damn interested in it and still have huge enthusiasm for improvement. WHy not a better guitar and lessons? Yamaha would do, but I don't mind Fender or Ibanez or others.
10. Powerful Desktop
Partially for games, partially for multimedia. Mainly as my working station. Why da hell do i need such powerful then? Of course, it would be an advantage if i can play all kinds of game with it and when i talk about computer, I do multi tasking. I like connecting multiple screens. Strictly speaking, I don't want just a desktop but a command center unit! Hmmm this....wonder how much it cost???
Well, it will change from time to time. and obviously I can't afford all by end of next year. Perhaps, the first 2 is my priority and the earphones too. Lets see how much of those I could afford.
I told myself no matter what I have to write a new year's review and resolution but now its not the time yet I suppose. Well, I think I should update myself regarding the things I've done this few days and some parts of my emotional experience.
As some of you might know, I am back in the area where I did my Bachelor degree. The journey was really one of its kind, never experienced that before. The flight was cancelled due to heavy snow hence the shut down of the airport. No one to blame for that, as its caused by the weather. But what leaves us frustrated was that there was only one counter open for the refund or alternative routes, and the few person before me took damn long to settle their stuff and i'm not very sure what are they demanding about. It was kinda lucky for us since we're travelling within germany and so we are able to get complementary train tickets. Personally I prefer to travel via train within the nation as I don't have to go through all those hectic procedure to check in 1 hour earlier and travel to airport etc etc. So it was great for me to get the train.
So I manage to reach Duesseldorf safe and sound. I was really suprised to see such a thick snow covering the streets and the rail track. Was one of its kind and never in my 4 years I've seen such snow. No wonder they close the airport. It was also a mess for the trains as there were delays and train cancellation due to the blockade of the tracks.
On the good side, I had a good Christmas. On that day itself, we had a pot luck party involving some Malaysian students from the senior batch to the latest freshies. Of course, I was the Si Si Si Senior among them haha. On one hand I was kinda envy that they had such big community now compare to my time where I was the only one with the braveheart to come alone here. On the other side, I'm glad that the network is finally expanding and it would be great for the next few generation of Malaysian students here. It was one of those party where we never drank alcohol, suits me alot. We drank those alcohol free beer from Edinger and Becks. We had great food such as Duck a la Oranje, Mui Choi Kau yok, Bak ki, shrimps with corn, char kuey tiao, curry chicken, mix vege and dessert like Tiramisu, fruit cocktail and some spanish pudding. Then we had some chat and lots of singing. It was the first time I touched the guitar in this year I suppose and I'm surprised I still have the knack for that. Partially it was the guitar. Yamaha semi acoustic, very beautiful sound and the strings were easy to press. There were another two or three guy who can also play guitar and we were just having fun jamming. I think if i had such big bunch of Malaysian friends during my studies, it would have been more fun. But it was a great experience for me too anyway during my time. I'm glad to meet up with some old friends of mine.
Thats all for now!
As some of you might know, I am back in the area where I did my Bachelor degree. The journey was really one of its kind, never experienced that before. The flight was cancelled due to heavy snow hence the shut down of the airport. No one to blame for that, as its caused by the weather. But what leaves us frustrated was that there was only one counter open for the refund or alternative routes, and the few person before me took damn long to settle their stuff and i'm not very sure what are they demanding about. It was kinda lucky for us since we're travelling within germany and so we are able to get complementary train tickets. Personally I prefer to travel via train within the nation as I don't have to go through all those hectic procedure to check in 1 hour earlier and travel to airport etc etc. So it was great for me to get the train.
So I manage to reach Duesseldorf safe and sound. I was really suprised to see such a thick snow covering the streets and the rail track. Was one of its kind and never in my 4 years I've seen such snow. No wonder they close the airport. It was also a mess for the trains as there were delays and train cancellation due to the blockade of the tracks.
On the good side, I had a good Christmas. On that day itself, we had a pot luck party involving some Malaysian students from the senior batch to the latest freshies. Of course, I was the Si Si Si Senior among them haha. On one hand I was kinda envy that they had such big community now compare to my time where I was the only one with the braveheart to come alone here. On the other side, I'm glad that the network is finally expanding and it would be great for the next few generation of Malaysian students here. It was one of those party where we never drank alcohol, suits me alot. We drank those alcohol free beer from Edinger and Becks. We had great food such as Duck a la Oranje, Mui Choi Kau yok, Bak ki, shrimps with corn, char kuey tiao, curry chicken, mix vege and dessert like Tiramisu, fruit cocktail and some spanish pudding. Then we had some chat and lots of singing. It was the first time I touched the guitar in this year I suppose and I'm surprised I still have the knack for that. Partially it was the guitar. Yamaha semi acoustic, very beautiful sound and the strings were easy to press. There were another two or three guy who can also play guitar and we were just having fun jamming. I think if i had such big bunch of Malaysian friends during my studies, it would have been more fun. But it was a great experience for me too anyway during my time. I'm glad to meet up with some old friends of mine.
Thats all for now!
Was about to update last week until something really stupid came up that took my time away. Oh well, long story and all i can say is I'll be hell busy again and so i guess i'll update less. Perhaps when i have the mood, i'll talk about it.
Anywayz, after missing last week's basketball, this week resumes. It was a great game but today was like kinda less people. we played 3 on 4, and I was on the 3 side. As usual, game started slow for me, as i missed simple lay up which i can close my eyes and do few years back. Since we are playing fullcourt, they also agree that we're not allowed to shoot the ball from outside the paint unless it's a 3pt shot. My outside shooting today was good but too bad they have that rule lol. But still, despite being the handicap team, we put up a show. Mainly because in our team, there's like this guy who can run all over the court and he's tall and fast. He always gets the steal. Another guy who can shoot n dribble towards the court. While me, I was on fire today, not just outside shooting but penetrating the net. I did moves like double clutches though it looks ugly, and i went reverse lay up, no look pass and the highlight was one fast break moment. I was dribbling down the court, and it was a 2 on 1 situation. I saw my teammate open, and usually i'll pass to him. But i decided to go all the way myself. As soon as i get closer to the rim, the defender came over to me. I spin the ball behind my back, acting as if i'm gonna pass. Then the defender hop to my teammate, and at that instant I spin the ball back my waist, and lay it up. 2 points!!! that was the thing of the day! Everyone was cheering for that. It was my first time too that I manage to do those tricks in a real game against somebody who's larger and knows basketball.
Well, i like to talk big about myself recently, but u know me well. Deep inside me, i just felt like I'm a tiny man. NO balls! Really. I always felt I'm smooth because when I'm on I can joke and talk. But recently my lameness really disappear and each time i see the mirror of my blardy bombarded pimple face, I really felt so low. Is there anyway to look good without having good looks? Teach me please.
I guess all for now.
Anywayz, after missing last week's basketball, this week resumes. It was a great game but today was like kinda less people. we played 3 on 4, and I was on the 3 side. As usual, game started slow for me, as i missed simple lay up which i can close my eyes and do few years back. Since we are playing fullcourt, they also agree that we're not allowed to shoot the ball from outside the paint unless it's a 3pt shot. My outside shooting today was good but too bad they have that rule lol. But still, despite being the handicap team, we put up a show. Mainly because in our team, there's like this guy who can run all over the court and he's tall and fast. He always gets the steal. Another guy who can shoot n dribble towards the court. While me, I was on fire today, not just outside shooting but penetrating the net. I did moves like double clutches though it looks ugly, and i went reverse lay up, no look pass and the highlight was one fast break moment. I was dribbling down the court, and it was a 2 on 1 situation. I saw my teammate open, and usually i'll pass to him. But i decided to go all the way myself. As soon as i get closer to the rim, the defender came over to me. I spin the ball behind my back, acting as if i'm gonna pass. Then the defender hop to my teammate, and at that instant I spin the ball back my waist, and lay it up. 2 points!!! that was the thing of the day! Everyone was cheering for that. It was my first time too that I manage to do those tricks in a real game against somebody who's larger and knows basketball.
Well, i like to talk big about myself recently, but u know me well. Deep inside me, i just felt like I'm a tiny man. NO balls! Really. I always felt I'm smooth because when I'm on I can joke and talk. But recently my lameness really disappear and each time i see the mirror of my blardy bombarded pimple face, I really felt so low. Is there anyway to look good without having good looks? Teach me please.
I guess all for now.
today I skipped BBA for many reasons. Certainly weather is one of it. But the consolation was that I get to watched the El Clasico. I feel sorry for Mourinho, such a highly anticipated game turn ugly. Barca don't just play like a team, they act like a team too. Proven when Ronal-f**kingdo pushed the manager Pep. While losing 3 or 4 up, things turn really ugly. Really bad losers. I pity Messi, been hamburgered, sandwiched, squashed. Poor thing. Real Losers! But, being much of a Barca supporter in this match, 5 goals with lots of action and fight, was great to watch. Haven't been watching such high standard football since the Germany Argentina and England match. I missed out on MU's 7-1 crush game.
Recently I've been really moody and emotional. In office, there are some guys with their typical thinking, really show obvious signs that they don't like Aliens like us walking around their office. One of them is a group leader, driving a BMW. Looks very typical German, act like one too. Oh well, he better get used to it as I will be in the office for another 5 months anyway. I'm really gladful to have a supervisor that doesn't give much pressure on me, and always encourage me to attend important things in the office. As intern, we're not required but he always wanted me to attend all the group and department meetings. Last Wed I was late and i missed it, but I was told he apologized to the whole group for my absence. Erm, I'm just a trainee guy there. Right now, I'm doing my thesis and I'm not even consider as an employee anymore. I am now a fulltime student with the permission to use their facilities. Erm, to clarify further, an intern is consider as an employee, with fixed working hours to fulfill and "allowance". Whereas for Thesis student, we're not required to work for certain hours and our monthly pay is consider as a grant for fulfilling our Thesis in a company. they judge based on the academic level how much to give, and divide it by how many months I'll be here.
Back to Bosch. Erm, yes despite virtually having high hopes from my supervisor for me to stay, unfortunately he's not the person with the power to hire. One "hidden" rule is that, you have to speak fluent German on top of English. I'd be honest, I have been far much quieter while I'm in office, mainly due to the language barrier. I can speak German, and can quite understand well, but I'd say my level is just around 3-4 out of 10. Barely enough to survive in a high quality company. Perhaps u might think, there's not much need of an engineer to speak, wrong! Most of the job posted requires great communication skill as our projects are always between departments to departments. Even my thesis, the layout are done by layout experts. My task is to instruct the experts how I want it to be done, and that requires a great communication skills. I was lucky enough that the layout expert dealing with my project is doing his training as he works for Bosch India and speaks only English. The indian style of course.
So, as much as I would love to have a few more years of experience in Bosch, I doubt my chances. I've submitted my papers for the career day this Saturday, but receive no official invitation from them. That means, I'm uninvited to go. Too bad. But I am quite optimistic that by the time I grad, jobs will be waiting for me. With a Master Degree from one of the best in Asia and Europe, plus a great deal of experience in Bosch, I believe jobs will come to me in a great economy condition. Just hope no recession during that time. As much as I felt being capable of doing a PhD, I think i'll leave the head damage aside. I'm really looking forward for all these academic stuff to end. I am honestly a lil sick of studying, though i know it's a neve ending cycle.
Anyway, to end this post. I'd just have to say....It's already the end of 4th Month I'm here, and another 5 to go. Hooray! Erm, deadline will be the week before Christmas for my Design, and things are going quite well at the moment. Then, it will be my Christmas break with some of my old friends in Duisburg. Yeah! Looking forward.
Recently I've been really moody and emotional. In office, there are some guys with their typical thinking, really show obvious signs that they don't like Aliens like us walking around their office. One of them is a group leader, driving a BMW. Looks very typical German, act like one too. Oh well, he better get used to it as I will be in the office for another 5 months anyway. I'm really gladful to have a supervisor that doesn't give much pressure on me, and always encourage me to attend important things in the office. As intern, we're not required but he always wanted me to attend all the group and department meetings. Last Wed I was late and i missed it, but I was told he apologized to the whole group for my absence. Erm, I'm just a trainee guy there. Right now, I'm doing my thesis and I'm not even consider as an employee anymore. I am now a fulltime student with the permission to use their facilities. Erm, to clarify further, an intern is consider as an employee, with fixed working hours to fulfill and "allowance". Whereas for Thesis student, we're not required to work for certain hours and our monthly pay is consider as a grant for fulfilling our Thesis in a company. they judge based on the academic level how much to give, and divide it by how many months I'll be here.
Back to Bosch. Erm, yes despite virtually having high hopes from my supervisor for me to stay, unfortunately he's not the person with the power to hire. One "hidden" rule is that, you have to speak fluent German on top of English. I'd be honest, I have been far much quieter while I'm in office, mainly due to the language barrier. I can speak German, and can quite understand well, but I'd say my level is just around 3-4 out of 10. Barely enough to survive in a high quality company. Perhaps u might think, there's not much need of an engineer to speak, wrong! Most of the job posted requires great communication skill as our projects are always between departments to departments. Even my thesis, the layout are done by layout experts. My task is to instruct the experts how I want it to be done, and that requires a great communication skills. I was lucky enough that the layout expert dealing with my project is doing his training as he works for Bosch India and speaks only English. The indian style of course.
So, as much as I would love to have a few more years of experience in Bosch, I doubt my chances. I've submitted my papers for the career day this Saturday, but receive no official invitation from them. That means, I'm uninvited to go. Too bad. But I am quite optimistic that by the time I grad, jobs will be waiting for me. With a Master Degree from one of the best in Asia and Europe, plus a great deal of experience in Bosch, I believe jobs will come to me in a great economy condition. Just hope no recession during that time. As much as I felt being capable of doing a PhD, I think i'll leave the head damage aside. I'm really looking forward for all these academic stuff to end. I am honestly a lil sick of studying, though i know it's a neve ending cycle.
Anyway, to end this post. I'd just have to say....It's already the end of 4th Month I'm here, and another 5 to go. Hooray! Erm, deadline will be the week before Christmas for my Design, and things are going quite well at the moment. Then, it will be my Christmas break with some of my old friends in Duisburg. Yeah! Looking forward.
It really cheer me up while reading the short comments regarding toothbrush and baseball bat. Luckily they both haven't seen my joystick yet. so can't compare mine lol.
Jiwang is back. I've never been using this word since the post where u can find jiwang. Should I explain it again? Nah, I guess those who read will understand anywayz.
First, lets talk about the small little BBA I had, which is a routine Monday thingy. BBA stands for Bosch Basketball Association. Today, we are short of 2 players but still play 4 on 4 full court. My legs till now are shivering, after such tiring game. Initially all went wrong, My shots either didn't reach the basket all was just blocked. It lasted like that for almost half hour. Finally they call for break. While they have their small little chat, I took the ball and keep shooting. Finally found my rhythm again. It was woop, swoosh, dong dong swoosh and the highlight of my game was the fancy no look behind my back alley oop pass. If that guy were a little taller, I think he'll tear the rim apart already lol.
Now the negative from the game. I believe basketball is called contact sports for a reason right? The whole game, I never called a foul because I want the game to flow. I had been fouled few times, especially a small guy like me trying to penetrate the zone with those big guys inside. But I choose to keep quiet. Just let the game flow aint? NO. Every small click of the hand, FOUL. Before you even know what's happening, FOUL. This is really boring. Don't like it at all. C'mon, some even have their arm bigger than my thigh, GDI! But overall it was still quite enjoyable.
Now the emo part comes. As u know, I have to walk home after games n today was extremely long journey home as I was feeling so tired. But I had lots of flashbacks. It was dark of course, little cars flowing around. I used to be some night crawler too. I am different night crawler, as in I am not those who club or hang late and become drunken Master. But I rmb, since I have my freedom, I hang out in mamak till late night, go for pool games, basketball sometimes with the BASEBALL BAT i remember in Puchong, of course with the TOOTHBRUSH too lol. Even my holidays in Malaysia everytime I came back during summer, I had lots of great memories just hanging out in the mamak or simply watching movies. It's different now. I know, I am always those guy who's always in second gear and dragging. But, I really felt so nostalgic about it. Nobody is willing to have some midnight bball anymore, or just sit down talking to u for 4 hours in a mosquito heaven place. It's either everyone gets too bored and decided to go home, or everyone rather go drink and get drunk. Like I said, I've nothing against people who drink. I do like to have 1 or 2 just for a chill, but I don't prefer. I know clearly I don't have the DNA of alcohol too anywayz. Can't drink much.
One thing I like about Germany is that, if you are with the right person, whether its winter summer or whatever, you enjoy just sitting outside the park, feeling the cold breeze and stare at the beautiful star studded sky. It doesn't have to be a romantic one. I remember having those moments with my Malaysian friends, guys mostly. I guess its fair to say, we all come from a long way, and we knew exactly how it is to be in a foreign land, while all our close ones are back home. Sadly, I am just too alone here I can't find myself enjoying. Seriously, don't question my ability to make friends, its really the people around me aren't clicking. Perhaps u can accuse me for being too picky, but I wouldn't force myself on things I don't really like. At least I still have my Autobahn internet, and can still watch movies and stuff. Not bad at all.
Life, is like living in a dream within a dream.
Jiwang is back. I've never been using this word since the post where u can find jiwang. Should I explain it again? Nah, I guess those who read will understand anywayz.
First, lets talk about the small little BBA I had, which is a routine Monday thingy. BBA stands for Bosch Basketball Association. Today, we are short of 2 players but still play 4 on 4 full court. My legs till now are shivering, after such tiring game. Initially all went wrong, My shots either didn't reach the basket all was just blocked. It lasted like that for almost half hour. Finally they call for break. While they have their small little chat, I took the ball and keep shooting. Finally found my rhythm again. It was woop, swoosh, dong dong swoosh and the highlight of my game was the fancy no look behind my back alley oop pass. If that guy were a little taller, I think he'll tear the rim apart already lol.
Now the negative from the game. I believe basketball is called contact sports for a reason right? The whole game, I never called a foul because I want the game to flow. I had been fouled few times, especially a small guy like me trying to penetrate the zone with those big guys inside. But I choose to keep quiet. Just let the game flow aint? NO. Every small click of the hand, FOUL. Before you even know what's happening, FOUL. This is really boring. Don't like it at all. C'mon, some even have their arm bigger than my thigh, GDI! But overall it was still quite enjoyable.
Now the emo part comes. As u know, I have to walk home after games n today was extremely long journey home as I was feeling so tired. But I had lots of flashbacks. It was dark of course, little cars flowing around. I used to be some night crawler too. I am different night crawler, as in I am not those who club or hang late and become drunken Master. But I rmb, since I have my freedom, I hang out in mamak till late night, go for pool games, basketball sometimes with the BASEBALL BAT i remember in Puchong, of course with the TOOTHBRUSH too lol. Even my holidays in Malaysia everytime I came back during summer, I had lots of great memories just hanging out in the mamak or simply watching movies. It's different now. I know, I am always those guy who's always in second gear and dragging. But, I really felt so nostalgic about it. Nobody is willing to have some midnight bball anymore, or just sit down talking to u for 4 hours in a mosquito heaven place. It's either everyone gets too bored and decided to go home, or everyone rather go drink and get drunk. Like I said, I've nothing against people who drink. I do like to have 1 or 2 just for a chill, but I don't prefer. I know clearly I don't have the DNA of alcohol too anywayz. Can't drink much.
One thing I like about Germany is that, if you are with the right person, whether its winter summer or whatever, you enjoy just sitting outside the park, feeling the cold breeze and stare at the beautiful star studded sky. It doesn't have to be a romantic one. I remember having those moments with my Malaysian friends, guys mostly. I guess its fair to say, we all come from a long way, and we knew exactly how it is to be in a foreign land, while all our close ones are back home. Sadly, I am just too alone here I can't find myself enjoying. Seriously, don't question my ability to make friends, its really the people around me aren't clicking. Perhaps u can accuse me for being too picky, but I wouldn't force myself on things I don't really like. At least I still have my Autobahn internet, and can still watch movies and stuff. Not bad at all.
Life, is like living in a dream within a dream.
It's already the final part of November, but i can say i am still hung over the great holidays i had in May - July, as well as some magical moments throughout my time in Singapore. Since I was 19, I have to say I am always doing things alone, living life myself. Not that I have no friends, in fact I am so glad I do have real friends, because i don't think i am able to walk down the road being really alone. What I mean alone, is that I am always apart from family and friends. I made new friends of course, but sometimes it's not just so easy to move along.
People who know me, they will think I have a strong mentality and principles. I don't get easily influence by people. Even I used to think that way. But recently, I start re-evaluating myself. I realize I am far worse than I thought. Sometimes when you're always alone, walking the streets yourself, you tend to have more time to think about stuffs. Especially when there's this cold breeze blowing through your face, makes you wake up from dreams.
I always thought I have my own character. It's my personality. I don't mind being the minority. In fact in many situations I am the minority. But now i realize, I am trying hard to be someone. The someone is not just one person, it's a little bit of everyone. In another words, I think I've messed up my whole character building stuff. I might be trained as an engineer, who's suppose to be brilliant in new ideas. Unfortunately, I am not those brilliant engineers. I am good at bring pieces from other people's work and stuff it together to create something i called new. But this ain't new right? Just like my "unique" character i was once proud of. Now i realize, my so called unique, is just bits and pieces of other people's work. I am walking not just behind one person's shadow, i am walking behind alot of people's shadow.
I am nobody.
People who know me, they will think I have a strong mentality and principles. I don't get easily influence by people. Even I used to think that way. But recently, I start re-evaluating myself. I realize I am far worse than I thought. Sometimes when you're always alone, walking the streets yourself, you tend to have more time to think about stuffs. Especially when there's this cold breeze blowing through your face, makes you wake up from dreams.
I always thought I have my own character. It's my personality. I don't mind being the minority. In fact in many situations I am the minority. But now i realize, I am trying hard to be someone. The someone is not just one person, it's a little bit of everyone. In another words, I think I've messed up my whole character building stuff. I might be trained as an engineer, who's suppose to be brilliant in new ideas. Unfortunately, I am not those brilliant engineers. I am good at bring pieces from other people's work and stuff it together to create something i called new. But this ain't new right? Just like my "unique" character i was once proud of. Now i realize, my so called unique, is just bits and pieces of other people's work. I am walking not just behind one person's shadow, i am walking behind alot of people's shadow.
I am nobody.
After writing my previous post, I spent some time actually reading back on those blogs that I've written. Its good as it traces me back to the things i've done in the past. I think I should write more so that it is easier for me to refer back to what i've done next time. But as again, it is mood dependent. So i guess its on and off thingy here.
Well, i'm not quite done with the wonders of human being. I have a colleague who asked me, what is the most important sports in Malaysia? I answer him, badminton. My explanation was that badminton did earn some fame for the Malaysians, and there are not much other sports that bring such international fame to Malaysia than that. I mean, even our beloved olympic silver medalist "earns" his Dato through this sports aint? But i told him if you talk about popularity, i think it is football. Everybody loves football, whether they can play or not. Right? So that makes it popular. So he replied, Malaysia don't even have a international stage football team. Yes undeniable. But as i understand my english pretty well, importance and popularity are define in such as given in my example. right? or?
I guess perhaps i should mention some discrepencies in communication or understanding everytime i blog. I meet different ppl everytime in my life, and of course i have the benefit of meeting quite number of people from around the globe. But, I'd say you don't need that. U see all kinda "weird" behaviour that you can never understand from our own country anyway. Even worse, sometimes u don't even know the person close to you like you always do. So what more to a foreigner?
Philosophies again. Yeah I am an engineer. BORING is my profession. So bare with me.
just some updates of myself. 3 1/2 month since Im here. Weather change from where i depart, 35 degrees sunny, to nice 25 sunny cold air in August, and slowly now its rainy and around 0 degress with the sun hiding at 4pm already. Lifestyle wise, terrible. Lonely. Bored. Emotional and very quiet. Work wise, fantastic. Company is great, project I'm doing is great, definitely gained huge experience.
Things I enjoyed here. Internet speed. It's not Autobahn yet, but it is definitely better than North South Highway. Regular basketball, indoor and good facilities. I don't even get much of those back home nowadays eventhough it's freaking sunny weather suitable for outdoor games all year round. Reason? you know i know. But bad thing is, some guys they're huge, but they can't even bare minor stuff such as a slight hit on the hand, or step on foot stuff like that. Other that, it's the changing room. They are used to being fully naked, with the thing dangling around chatting during shower and stuff. I of course still pretty "Asian" in this sense. Well, not that I don't have the "Quality", just shy. But of course, can't compare la. u can't take a tooth brush and compare it with a baseball bat lol. Basically nothing much else i enjoy here.
Yes it sounds pathetic and no it is not really so. As i always mentioned in blogs and fb and everywhere else, it's not the location that matters. It's the company. You can have hell a great time if u have bunch of buddies that click like errr....click. Whatever. Get it? I did enjoy alot when I was in Duisburg, with those bunch of lamos around, though it wasn't easy either. Trust me, nothing beats home minus the politics.
Thats me......
Again disclaimer. Blogs are blogs. please respect the blogger and the bloggee. u like what u see, good. perhaps some lovely feedback. U dun like what u see, u can take this piece of shit, and scramble like a scramble egg. but don't blame me for any offensive feelings.
Well, i'm not quite done with the wonders of human being. I have a colleague who asked me, what is the most important sports in Malaysia? I answer him, badminton. My explanation was that badminton did earn some fame for the Malaysians, and there are not much other sports that bring such international fame to Malaysia than that. I mean, even our beloved olympic silver medalist "earns" his Dato through this sports aint? But i told him if you talk about popularity, i think it is football. Everybody loves football, whether they can play or not. Right? So that makes it popular. So he replied, Malaysia don't even have a international stage football team. Yes undeniable. But as i understand my english pretty well, importance and popularity are define in such as given in my example. right? or?
I guess perhaps i should mention some discrepencies in communication or understanding everytime i blog. I meet different ppl everytime in my life, and of course i have the benefit of meeting quite number of people from around the globe. But, I'd say you don't need that. U see all kinda "weird" behaviour that you can never understand from our own country anyway. Even worse, sometimes u don't even know the person close to you like you always do. So what more to a foreigner?
Philosophies again. Yeah I am an engineer. BORING is my profession. So bare with me.
just some updates of myself. 3 1/2 month since Im here. Weather change from where i depart, 35 degrees sunny, to nice 25 sunny cold air in August, and slowly now its rainy and around 0 degress with the sun hiding at 4pm already. Lifestyle wise, terrible. Lonely. Bored. Emotional and very quiet. Work wise, fantastic. Company is great, project I'm doing is great, definitely gained huge experience.
Things I enjoyed here. Internet speed. It's not Autobahn yet, but it is definitely better than North South Highway. Regular basketball, indoor and good facilities. I don't even get much of those back home nowadays eventhough it's freaking sunny weather suitable for outdoor games all year round. Reason? you know i know. But bad thing is, some guys they're huge, but they can't even bare minor stuff such as a slight hit on the hand, or step on foot stuff like that. Other that, it's the changing room. They are used to being fully naked, with the thing dangling around chatting during shower and stuff. I of course still pretty "Asian" in this sense. Well, not that I don't have the "Quality", just shy. But of course, can't compare la. u can't take a tooth brush and compare it with a baseball bat lol. Basically nothing much else i enjoy here.
Yes it sounds pathetic and no it is not really so. As i always mentioned in blogs and fb and everywhere else, it's not the location that matters. It's the company. You can have hell a great time if u have bunch of buddies that click like errr....click. Whatever. Get it? I did enjoy alot when I was in Duisburg, with those bunch of lamos around, though it wasn't easy either. Trust me, nothing beats home minus the politics.
Thats me......
Again disclaimer. Blogs are blogs. please respect the blogger and the bloggee. u like what u see, good. perhaps some lovely feedback. U dun like what u see, u can take this piece of shit, and scramble like a scramble egg. but don't blame me for any offensive feelings.
I think we can debate about the right definition of "common sense" and it will never end. Everyone view common sense in such different way. Oh well, since it has to be brought up in this post, we shall make a standard definition of common sense, like the Si unit. Lets say we say, common sense means everyone who's normal should have thought of it. And now it is defined, it is time to speak about the wonders of human being.
What would you do for example, if you know that your knowledge on a particular aspect is weak and you meet up with an expert? Nobody is perfect of course, but if I were in this situation, I will try to listen to his/her advice and think if it makes sense or not. Unless I am confident what the person says is wrong, I will normally take the advice. Common sense right? It gets me really frustrated when I am clearly better and knowing what I am saying, but some people just think they're more superior. Fuck!
I have nothing against people who drink for pleasure. I mean, I personally don't prefer drinking, but alcohol is just a drink, right? Its like some people likes apple soda over apple juice. But some people, just drink alot until they get hangovers and they complain about how suffering it is. Some drink like mad, got drunk but deny of getting overboard. My question, why on earth people do so? where's the common sense? I know I am the minority in this case. But sorry i can't accept this so called "common drinking sense"!
What happen when u constantly get cheated, doesn't matter if its your love or money? Or perhaps i should ask something else. What happen if you have felt down many times from somewhere high up? My common sense tells me that I will be hugely afraid of the things that cause some damage in my life. I guess thats where phobias are developed in some ways isnt it? NO. I know some people who thinks the other way round. Mana common sense itu???
we can't please everybody. Yes it is clear. So if you have to choose who to please, how would you choose? My common sense will remind me that I will choose the people that means alot to me. My buddys for example, or my family or my love ones. But to some, situation comes and they are even confuse who really means alot to me? Ask yourself when you face such situation, are you able to distinguish who really matters to you? Ok my fault. In such case, there're no common sense anymore. Fuck!
I can go on and on about the wonders of my life, because I am some part the majority, some in minority and that sometimes contradict with other people's way of defining common sense. Whatever. It makes me sick of some parts in my life.
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for anybody who link themselves in one of those mentioned above, or felt offended. If you think you are offended, means you probably commited one of those among others mentioned above. So go fuck yourself if u feel offended.
What would you do for example, if you know that your knowledge on a particular aspect is weak and you meet up with an expert? Nobody is perfect of course, but if I were in this situation, I will try to listen to his/her advice and think if it makes sense or not. Unless I am confident what the person says is wrong, I will normally take the advice. Common sense right? It gets me really frustrated when I am clearly better and knowing what I am saying, but some people just think they're more superior. Fuck!
I have nothing against people who drink for pleasure. I mean, I personally don't prefer drinking, but alcohol is just a drink, right? Its like some people likes apple soda over apple juice. But some people, just drink alot until they get hangovers and they complain about how suffering it is. Some drink like mad, got drunk but deny of getting overboard. My question, why on earth people do so? where's the common sense? I know I am the minority in this case. But sorry i can't accept this so called "common drinking sense"!
What happen when u constantly get cheated, doesn't matter if its your love or money? Or perhaps i should ask something else. What happen if you have felt down many times from somewhere high up? My common sense tells me that I will be hugely afraid of the things that cause some damage in my life. I guess thats where phobias are developed in some ways isnt it? NO. I know some people who thinks the other way round. Mana common sense itu???
we can't please everybody. Yes it is clear. So if you have to choose who to please, how would you choose? My common sense will remind me that I will choose the people that means alot to me. My buddys for example, or my family or my love ones. But to some, situation comes and they are even confuse who really means alot to me? Ask yourself when you face such situation, are you able to distinguish who really matters to you? Ok my fault. In such case, there're no common sense anymore. Fuck!
I can go on and on about the wonders of my life, because I am some part the majority, some in minority and that sometimes contradict with other people's way of defining common sense. Whatever. It makes me sick of some parts in my life.
Disclaimer: I am not responsible for anybody who link themselves in one of those mentioned above, or felt offended. If you think you are offended, means you probably commited one of those among others mentioned above. So go fuck yourself if u feel offended.
When I woke up this morning, everything was as usual. The sun was shining, wind was blowing, even the temperature was not too low today. Suddenly I realize that I am in Germany! Not in Singapore! I really miss my life in Singapore, though it's only 10 months there. I stayed with my uncle, in a private condo and it is quite beautiful. just across the condo is the MRT station, and it takes me to basically everywhere I want to go. about 5 mins walk it's the hawker center and shops. Right opposite to it, there's a stadium with indoor badminton courts. That is what I call a life!
Well, I do complain the selfishness and the busyness of Singapore. To be honest, I find the Germans more "friendly" compare to Asians. Of course you get a better response if you try to speak to them in German. But it is understandable. You would feel more "home" when somebody speaks your dialect or language.
Germany is well known for their transportation too. Yes indeed, the train system here is superbly connected, like a spider web or WWW. But if you're living in a small town, it is not the case. My place the only public transport is bus and during weekends, it comes only every half hour. At least it has a schedule and it follows the timing quite accurately. I have never complained about public transport system especially when I come from Malaysia. No doubt. Just that, Singapore is doing a much better job when it comes to rural area. I guess the size of the country does matter too, not just the brains.
I was emotional today. I suddenly felt like I want to go down from 19 floor, walk 5 minutes and have chicken rice with gizzard. I suddenly felt I want to play badminton, or basketball. I suddenly felt like taking MRT to Chinatown and have the German sausage, although I'm in Germany now. It's just so nostalgic having those moments and I really miss it.
I still remember darling came over to visit me during valentines day week. She kept it so secretly, that she pretend she's busy working in KL and on Friday where she was travelling in the bus, she acted as if she have a meeting and therefore wasn't able to email me. That day I still remember I had outing with Sj4pians at night in Chinatown. Suddenly I receive call from her saying that she's now in Harbourfront. What a surprise! I love her so much. Now I am missing her so much.
I guess it was never easy when u're lonely here and all your close ones are far away from u, especially with a time gap in between.
Well, I do complain the selfishness and the busyness of Singapore. To be honest, I find the Germans more "friendly" compare to Asians. Of course you get a better response if you try to speak to them in German. But it is understandable. You would feel more "home" when somebody speaks your dialect or language.
Germany is well known for their transportation too. Yes indeed, the train system here is superbly connected, like a spider web or WWW. But if you're living in a small town, it is not the case. My place the only public transport is bus and during weekends, it comes only every half hour. At least it has a schedule and it follows the timing quite accurately. I have never complained about public transport system especially when I come from Malaysia. No doubt. Just that, Singapore is doing a much better job when it comes to rural area. I guess the size of the country does matter too, not just the brains.
I was emotional today. I suddenly felt like I want to go down from 19 floor, walk 5 minutes and have chicken rice with gizzard. I suddenly felt I want to play badminton, or basketball. I suddenly felt like taking MRT to Chinatown and have the German sausage, although I'm in Germany now. It's just so nostalgic having those moments and I really miss it.
I still remember darling came over to visit me during valentines day week. She kept it so secretly, that she pretend she's busy working in KL and on Friday where she was travelling in the bus, she acted as if she have a meeting and therefore wasn't able to email me. That day I still remember I had outing with Sj4pians at night in Chinatown. Suddenly I receive call from her saying that she's now in Harbourfront. What a surprise! I love her so much. Now I am missing her so much.
I guess it was never easy when u're lonely here and all your close ones are far away from u, especially with a time gap in between.
A few obvious observation that obviously obvious to everyone. First of all, the fastest thing on earth is time, not light. Time passes so freaking damn fast that you don't even notice it. It is already the end of my 2nd week here in Germany. However I am still feeling the moments of those days before I left, as if it just happened yesterday. Weekdays passes even much faster. I guess when u are at a routine time will shoot much faster. Next week on, I will be getting more focus into my task and it would be difficult. I guess, time would have past even faster then.
2nd observation, technology factor. I realize, not just here but while I was in Singapore as well, that the higher your status or rank in your field, you tend to simpler gadgets. Use phone as example. I am surrounded by professors and top experienced engineer who took part in designing chips for mobile phone, and should be very very advance technologically. But, no! They use primitive phone which basically can sms and call thats about it. Wonder why. Don't they appreciate their effort, or it's just a trend. I guess, it's true when you at that high level, you don't really need so much function. You have manpower to do the job for you such as managing your schedule and stuff. A quote from my manager during our coffee break :-
2nd observation, technology factor. I realize, not just here but while I was in Singapore as well, that the higher your status or rank in your field, you tend to simpler gadgets. Use phone as example. I am surrounded by professors and top experienced engineer who took part in designing chips for mobile phone, and should be very very advance technologically. But, no! They use primitive phone which basically can sms and call thats about it. Wonder why. Don't they appreciate their effort, or it's just a trend. I guess, it's true when you at that high level, you don't really need so much function. You have manpower to do the job for you such as managing your schedule and stuff. A quote from my manager during our coffee break :-
"THE HIGHER YOUR STATUS, THE SIMPLER YOUR CALCULATOR IS...."
Haha how true. We use matlab, while he use scientific calculator. I think the CEO uses only hand to calculate lol.
3rd observation, the language barrier. Despite being in an international company, I still pretty much work in a very German atmosphere and the only thing in English I encounter is when I talk to my supervisor regarding technical stuff. Well, they don't mind that I speak English of course, and I could understand them around 60% - 70% on average, but it's still different. I felt like I am so mute now, no more the talkative me. Its stupid when I claim in my Resume that I can speak so many language. I think there should be a more accurate way to calculate the language you're able to speak. I felt my actual proficiency in languages are around 3.3 lol. 3.3 means I basically can speak around 3 and 1/3 languages and how I calculate it? I take the average of the language I'm able to speak with some scale (e.g. English 0.9, German 0.3).
Yeah boring.....
3rd observation, the language barrier. Despite being in an international company, I still pretty much work in a very German atmosphere and the only thing in English I encounter is when I talk to my supervisor regarding technical stuff. Well, they don't mind that I speak English of course, and I could understand them around 60% - 70% on average, but it's still different. I felt like I am so mute now, no more the talkative me. Its stupid when I claim in my Resume that I can speak so many language. I think there should be a more accurate way to calculate the language you're able to speak. I felt my actual proficiency in languages are around 3.3 lol. 3.3 means I basically can speak around 3 and 1/3 languages and how I calculate it? I take the average of the language I'm able to speak with some scale (e.g. English 0.9, German 0.3).
Yeah boring.....
I was never somebody with confidence. Despite having a relatively good performance academically so far, I still feel that I don't belong to this field that I am studying. It's not just studies that I felt incompetent, in many other fields too. We speak about sports, I am good in basketball and badminton, yet I know I am below average players. Talent perhaps? I can play guitar but still a noob. Computer stuff? Yeah, basic photoshop and some basic hardware knowledge. On the outside, looks? that would be a close zero. body? two pairs of guitar(ribs) and a big heavy bass drums(tummy). So, what else am I good at? Basically nothing.
I am in a big company as an intern. I am still doubtful how did I get in here. I guess probably it's because of the phone interview, and I manage to scribble through the conversation despite not very fundamentally strong with my theories. Work experience? I have none. Pure academic CV. Now, I am a total noobie!
Lets talk about contribution to the society. I am 25 years old, at least 80% of my friends at this age are already earning some bucks, starting to pay off study debts, or started investments. Me? I am still draining my parent's money, and will be for another while more.
Maybe looking at a smaller circle. Among me and my close ones. I recall, throughout the past 1 1/2 years, I have spend only 30% or 40% of the total amount me and my gf spent. She treat me more meals, bought me more stuff. I somehow feel I am a leech, and I seriously don't feel good about it.
Okay, maybe money talks aren't quite interesting. How bout mental and emotional? I am a nomad. I was never settled at one place. I still remember patching things up with her last year April, and had a superb wonderful time till July. Then, I left her in tears as I have to leave to Singapore. I do visit home once a while, and she does visit me too. But counting the days we have vs the days we visit each other, it's probably 1/100 or more. Furthermore, I was never there by her side whenever she needed me. Then, I was there to have a such a wonderful 2 months holiday in June and July, now left her alone again back there and this time I am 10000km away from her for at least the next 9 months, without even the probability to visit each other often. Especially during critical moments, I was never there.
Forgive me for being pessimistic, but things would never be the same anymore after all these, despite surviving. Gap is porportional to time and distance. The longer it drags, the further the gap is. Don't even think of advising me to look at the future side. I hate the word future. Future is like a dream, where you can architect anything you want, but doesn't mean it will be true. Talk to me bout present times unless you come from the future.
I have no qualities of being somebody's boyfriend.
Sigh......Not so much invented for life, but incepted for life i guess!
I am in a big company as an intern. I am still doubtful how did I get in here. I guess probably it's because of the phone interview, and I manage to scribble through the conversation despite not very fundamentally strong with my theories. Work experience? I have none. Pure academic CV. Now, I am a total noobie!
Lets talk about contribution to the society. I am 25 years old, at least 80% of my friends at this age are already earning some bucks, starting to pay off study debts, or started investments. Me? I am still draining my parent's money, and will be for another while more.
Maybe looking at a smaller circle. Among me and my close ones. I recall, throughout the past 1 1/2 years, I have spend only 30% or 40% of the total amount me and my gf spent. She treat me more meals, bought me more stuff. I somehow feel I am a leech, and I seriously don't feel good about it.
Okay, maybe money talks aren't quite interesting. How bout mental and emotional? I am a nomad. I was never settled at one place. I still remember patching things up with her last year April, and had a superb wonderful time till July. Then, I left her in tears as I have to leave to Singapore. I do visit home once a while, and she does visit me too. But counting the days we have vs the days we visit each other, it's probably 1/100 or more. Furthermore, I was never there by her side whenever she needed me. Then, I was there to have a such a wonderful 2 months holiday in June and July, now left her alone again back there and this time I am 10000km away from her for at least the next 9 months, without even the probability to visit each other often. Especially during critical moments, I was never there.
Forgive me for being pessimistic, but things would never be the same anymore after all these, despite surviving. Gap is porportional to time and distance. The longer it drags, the further the gap is. Don't even think of advising me to look at the future side. I hate the word future. Future is like a dream, where you can architect anything you want, but doesn't mean it will be true. Talk to me bout present times unless you come from the future.
I have no qualities of being somebody's boyfriend.
Sigh......Not so much invented for life, but incepted for life i guess!
Well since I'm not that Emo today, I will blog about my work environment. To intro abit, In my life I have worked for 4 different parties before. First my parents. Haha kinda unofficial work. I have worked part time in a Law firm, which i do almost everything except a lawyer's job. Then Fraunhofer Institute, though one of the renowned research institute in Germany, but I can say I was kinda slack over there. Then now Bosch.
Okay before I talk about Bosch, let me talk about work. Erm, just to clarify first, I am only an intern student despite calling this work. Now working life. First of all, very systematic. I have been actively using Microsoft Outlook now, which I've never do so in my life. Normally when I install Microsoft Office that bundles together with Outlook, I'll just remove it. I prefer to check my mails via internet page. I never had my own organizer or calander anywayz eventhough I am using a business phone. Now, even invitation to have an ice-cream from my supervisor is done using Outlook Calender. Same goes to Basketball with colleagues, or meeting one on one with my supervisor despite him sitting just next to me. I never felt so organized before. Oh but well, it's total different thing when I come home haha. I have to keep reminding myself what to do next. But good thing is that Windows 7 comes with the sticky notes which is quite useful.
Alright, now Bosch. Well despite still being kinda Alien in the office, I like the environment of Bosch. I tend to feel that they're some sorta CIA or FBI lol. First day itself I was given a short brief on security while working. Everything inside is confidential, we're not even allowed to take pictures of anything inside. Oh well I guess that's how the big firms do their stuff. Then, every software is protected and apparently I still can't log in to the WWW yet from my office as my account hasn't been approved. I have to log out of my screen whenever I go toilet or get a coffee. I am not suppose to bring anything in or out of Bosch without permission. Every email i send to the outside world has to be encrypted, and each person is given their personal encryption key. But of course, I have never used my company email yet as I don't deal with customers.
Despite having super tight security especially to the outside world, internally everything is kinda slack. Me and my colleagues are free to do whatever we want, of course about work la. So far I don't feel any stress or pressure yet, despite being very super noob in the office. Man, their like super engineers, seems to know everything, every programming language, every EDA tools and even their theory are super strong. I am just a noobie! I love the European working culture too. I need to fulfill 35 hours per week (actually it's 38.5 per week since they automatically deduct 45 mins from my daily working hours). But it's up to me to plan how I want to work. Basically I can work 10 hours a day and then take off on Friday. But of course, since I'm under supervision and only an intern, i can't just take leave like that. I am however allowed to if I have a reason. Right now I have 4.5 extra hours from the last week as I work quite long hours. Another thing bout them is coffee. Average we take about 1 1/2 hours of coffee break time, on top of our normal lunch hour. Despite being so slack, why are they so top of the world? One word - Efficient!
About me. I am given a workspace of course with a stationed laptop with a TFT monitor, only a 15 inch one. My startup will be on Windows based, but connected remotely to Linux based server. I work on Matlab so far and I will be working on Cadence Schematic/Layout Design soon, as well as Verilog modelling and it will all on Linux. I am a total noob in Linux, so i guess it's time to learn. My thesis will be mainly on Delta-Sigma Analog-to-Digital Converters, from system to subsystem to transistor level. Difficult but interesting stuff. Mainly for Automotive application.
Well, language is still a barrier for me despite having some basics in German. So its still hard for me to survive in the company thus far. I hope things will get better soon.
Invented for Life!
I have removed the music player as i guess it's kinda annoying and i'm not updating it. Bare with me as I will be very emo these few days. I am still quite emo today. It is my second Sunday here in Germany already. Well, I am still not sure if I should be happy as time passes fast. If you look from the back, yes time is passing real fast, but looking ahead it's still so long to go!
I guess I have an explanation why it is so difficult for me to settle down this time compare to last time. First of all, since I graduated in 2009, I have been having a relatively great time back home and in Singapore. I guess I was kinda spoilt already and I couldn't find the strength to be strong here like how I did last time. Maybe I'm too old for this shit. I guess last time I was young and dynamic, always wanted to experience new things and want to prove myself. Now, I guess all I want is just to settle down somewhere and have a life.
I am still missing home as I type this post so much. I just received news, regarding an ex-classmate whose father passed away. It sparked up my tears as I start to think about my parents. I don't know how they're doing and I really miss them. I know I won't be able to see them for the next 9 months and it is quite painful to know that. I never felt that way when I was in Singapore. I used to think that regardless of Singapore or Germany, it is the same as it is long distance. I guess now I was wrong. It does make a significant impact on me, emotionally.
I need strength, I really do. I am freaking 25 years old but I feel I wasn't as strong as I was in 19. I feel like a big baby now. So much for a promising future career path and so much for being look up to. I guess even I couldn't look up to myself now. I face the mirror everyday morning and I just wonder where is my courage. Yes I realize my problem is just a tiny small one. But still hurts like a bee sting and it's poisoning me, making me numb.
I guess if I am able to survive this well, and get good results from this internship/thesis, I would have a superb bright career future, but I don't dare to look so forward yet. I am still stuck in the past. I really miss Malaysia and Singapore at the moment.
C'mon Doug, be a man...!
I guess I have an explanation why it is so difficult for me to settle down this time compare to last time. First of all, since I graduated in 2009, I have been having a relatively great time back home and in Singapore. I guess I was kinda spoilt already and I couldn't find the strength to be strong here like how I did last time. Maybe I'm too old for this shit. I guess last time I was young and dynamic, always wanted to experience new things and want to prove myself. Now, I guess all I want is just to settle down somewhere and have a life.
I am still missing home as I type this post so much. I just received news, regarding an ex-classmate whose father passed away. It sparked up my tears as I start to think about my parents. I don't know how they're doing and I really miss them. I know I won't be able to see them for the next 9 months and it is quite painful to know that. I never felt that way when I was in Singapore. I used to think that regardless of Singapore or Germany, it is the same as it is long distance. I guess now I was wrong. It does make a significant impact on me, emotionally.
I need strength, I really do. I am freaking 25 years old but I feel I wasn't as strong as I was in 19. I feel like a big baby now. So much for a promising future career path and so much for being look up to. I guess even I couldn't look up to myself now. I face the mirror everyday morning and I just wonder where is my courage. Yes I realize my problem is just a tiny small one. But still hurts like a bee sting and it's poisoning me, making me numb.
I guess if I am able to survive this well, and get good results from this internship/thesis, I would have a superb bright career future, but I don't dare to look so forward yet. I am still stuck in the past. I really miss Malaysia and Singapore at the moment.
C'mon Doug, be a man...!
One week since I am in Germany for the 2nd time. If i have to describe the feeling in one sentence, I would say it was far more difficult than the first time I was here emotionally. Way back in January this year where most of our classmates were looking for an internship/thesis attachment, I decided to be different by looking further west, mainly Germany. At that time of course most companies are just recovering from recession and it was difficult.
I was lucky, or perhaps my German background, that I was called up for an interview with Franhofer Institute in Germany. I had a great feeling about the interview despite being a little bit slumber here and there, but I didn't get it in the end. I remember that I was kinda disappointed as my hopes were high, and that week itself darling came to visit me and I nearly screw up the whole trip. Then came 2 offer from Singapore, which is not really an offer. It is more like them looking for people to fill up their empty seats. I got one of the position which basically doesn't gives me the thing I want. Despite being quite reluctant, I have to take since no other offer came.
Out of no where at the end of April, I got this offer from Bosch, Germany. I was so excited as Bosch is pretty well known and the project was very interesting. I am excited to go back to Germany again. I have made so much sacrifice, and effort just to get to Germany. I have also spent unnecessary expenses just because I am coming back here.
So now I am finally here, and I was and still quite depressed. Last week was a disaster, I cried almost everyday while thinking of the time i spent in Malaysia/Singapore. I had such a wonderful 2 months holiday back home. Maybe just too wonderful that I have forgotten all my engineering enthusiasm and just felt maybe I am kinda sick of technical stuff. Although I seldom cry now, but I am still quite emotional whenever I am not doing anything and I am alone. I am always alone for now since I don't have any friends around here yet other than my colleagues. They are of course not here during weekends and even their here, it's not so clicking especially due to language barrier.
Anyway, I guess it will be back to me and bloggie again for the near future. So I guess I would update more often this time.
I would like to end this post with a dedication to my dearest baby. She have been extremely wonderful in my life. During the two months, despite also having some down times, the overall outcome was just so great. She did alot for me throughout the two months and also my preparation for Germany. She bought me some necessities knowing that i need it here. I don't know how she felt, but to me the greatest highlight of the whole holiday was finally the acceptance and the meeting of my parents. It has always been a burden to me but finally it has been resolve. She was also the one that gave me strength to hold on to my feet and move forward during my first few days in Germany. She called me and sms me eventhough it's blardy damn expensive just to make sure I am okay. She emailed me and gave me words of encouragement which is just priceless. I am finally able to be okay especially when I'm in office, and I really thank her alot. I know it's just promises now, but i guaranty that I will love her more and treat her better in the future, give her all that she needs and all the she wants!
I was lucky, or perhaps my German background, that I was called up for an interview with Franhofer Institute in Germany. I had a great feeling about the interview despite being a little bit slumber here and there, but I didn't get it in the end. I remember that I was kinda disappointed as my hopes were high, and that week itself darling came to visit me and I nearly screw up the whole trip. Then came 2 offer from Singapore, which is not really an offer. It is more like them looking for people to fill up their empty seats. I got one of the position which basically doesn't gives me the thing I want. Despite being quite reluctant, I have to take since no other offer came.
Out of no where at the end of April, I got this offer from Bosch, Germany. I was so excited as Bosch is pretty well known and the project was very interesting. I am excited to go back to Germany again. I have made so much sacrifice, and effort just to get to Germany. I have also spent unnecessary expenses just because I am coming back here.
So now I am finally here, and I was and still quite depressed. Last week was a disaster, I cried almost everyday while thinking of the time i spent in Malaysia/Singapore. I had such a wonderful 2 months holiday back home. Maybe just too wonderful that I have forgotten all my engineering enthusiasm and just felt maybe I am kinda sick of technical stuff. Although I seldom cry now, but I am still quite emotional whenever I am not doing anything and I am alone. I am always alone for now since I don't have any friends around here yet other than my colleagues. They are of course not here during weekends and even their here, it's not so clicking especially due to language barrier.
Anyway, I guess it will be back to me and bloggie again for the near future. So I guess I would update more often this time.
I would like to end this post with a dedication to my dearest baby. She have been extremely wonderful in my life. During the two months, despite also having some down times, the overall outcome was just so great. She did alot for me throughout the two months and also my preparation for Germany. She bought me some necessities knowing that i need it here. I don't know how she felt, but to me the greatest highlight of the whole holiday was finally the acceptance and the meeting of my parents. It has always been a burden to me but finally it has been resolve. She was also the one that gave me strength to hold on to my feet and move forward during my first few days in Germany. She called me and sms me eventhough it's blardy damn expensive just to make sure I am okay. She emailed me and gave me words of encouragement which is just priceless. I am finally able to be okay especially when I'm in office, and I really thank her alot. I know it's just promises now, but i guaranty that I will love her more and treat her better in the future, give her all that she needs and all the she wants!
I guess I have left this place dead again. Anyway, I really lack enthusiasm in blogging recently. Not that I've been xbusy but just no mood to blog. But I will from time to time share my updates and emotions here.
I wanna write about Universal Studio, but I'll leave that to the next post.
Rather, I'll sum up some updates here.
I have finished all my technical modules and left one non-technical module which is on this Saturday. But, as I've mentioned, it doesn't weight much to my total GPA and the exam only takes up 30% of the course, hence I'm not too concerned bout it. Overall, grades aren't too bad and still a few pending results. Just hope i don't screw them up.
Well, the good news first. I have officially been accepted to conduct my internship/thesis with Bosch in Reutlingen, Germany. I don't think I need to intro about Bosch, as everybody knows the company. Yeah the one making drills. Right now my only concern is the visa and hopefully nothing screws me up. I can't tell much about the benefits I'm gonna get, kinda confidential, but i can say Bosch treats even foreigners really damn good!
That's for the good side. The not-so-good side is that, my days in Singapore are almost over for the time being. Been here almost 10 months, and have lots of nostalgic moments and Singapore in general gave me a really good time overall. Read carefully, Singapore as in the country, still have some negatives towards the people here though I have some "good native friends". Shouldn't talk much about them though, some eyes are looking at this post.
Anyway, the Singapore experience. I still remember my first day was kinda screwed up. I took a cheap bus down, and was kinda conned by the bus driver. I don't blame him, i just blame my noobness. I was told to stop at the Singapore immigration as my uncle will come and take me, but i was so tired i slept and when i woke up I asked the bus driver if it's already singapore. He told me yeah yeah! So i took my luggage down and scanned through the passport check, and then called my uncle. Then only to find out that I'm still in Johor, blardy hell! The last time i came to singapore was 2005, and i forgotten we have to go thru 2 customs! lol. wat a way to start!
Then we were scared off by our program director, as he shows the statistics of failure in the past, and some killer subjects, and the intensiveness of this course. And at that moment, I was seriously feared off. You can't blame me for the fear though, as we malaysians are told that the Singapore education standard is super duper high. Additionally, it is a twinning program between Singapore and TUM, one of Germany's elite Uni in Applied Science and Engineering. and then the course started around august. just a few days later, 1 quit the course. Lol! are you shivering already?? lolx!!! that's how i felt and i'm afraid i will be the weakest in class knowing that my classmates are all elite students or experienced worker. One from Intel 3 years exp in US, one 9 years Digital IC Designer, one few years exp in Avago(HP), one already obtained an MBA, and whole list of them. Among the 30 students who enrolled in my class, I guess I'm the only one that graduates from an unknown University in Germany.
Now it came to an end, only 25 students left in my class. And I'm quite at the top average among them though. Felt surprised? I felt surprised too. Let me tell u the reason. NTU standard is pretty low compared to Germany. I don't know if it's higher than Malaysia or not as I've never been into any local uni, but definitely easy to pass. Another reason is that, those who were in the industry before find it difficult to switch back to study mode, especially that the course is running at a fast pace, i.e. 2 weeks lectures, then followed by exam. Of course, other reason do count but if i mention those, you people will think I'm too cocky. But as a matter of fact, I'm just giving my humble judgement. Anyway whatever! My main point is that, some group of people seem strong in the outside, but are actually weak! Some hypocrites in my class, some selfish gangs, and overall sux! The most humble guy in my class is an indonesian and he's the smartest of all i felt. So conclusion is, quality people are humble.
Anyway I still have to work hard for some of those subjects. I remember staying in campus till 11pm everyday in the library or lab just to complete my studies or lab work. I remember we had to pack some canteen food and eat on the bench outside the classroom because the canteen is super packed. Those were the days and i hope it will be behind me from now on.
I have too much to talk about the 10 months here in Singapore. I can't simply type and type as I'm losing my "stamina" too. Anyway, the main part that really made me happy was my baby T's visit to Singapore. The first time was when She came down for Christmas. We went Orchard, Suntec City, Esplanade, City Hall, Raffles Place, Chinese Garden, and many more. Took loads of pictures and was a super damn good trip. It was also our first real trip together overseas. The second visit was a surprise one. She totally caught me about it. She kept it so tight that I can't even feel she's hiding this trip from me. On a Friday night when I was in Chinatown with my college friends having our pre-CNY gathering, suddenly she called and told me that she's reaching soon. I was like, c'mon don't joke with me, and then the happy ending - she was really in Singapore. She got me a padini sling bag, and made me a wonderful valentines card too. We had tony romas for dinner, but this time we didn't tour much. 3rd time visit was in March, and we went to Sentosa Island as our main agenda. Went to the underwater world, and cruise around the beach, was great! I always wanted to walk along the beach with her. The last visit was 2 weeks ago, and we went Universal Studio, which i will post it up soon.
Now that i'm leaving Singapore "soon", I really kinda miss what Singapore have gave me. Maybe I'll do a summary of Singapore soon, again soon. Yeah when i have the mood!
I wanna write about Universal Studio, but I'll leave that to the next post.
Rather, I'll sum up some updates here.
I have finished all my technical modules and left one non-technical module which is on this Saturday. But, as I've mentioned, it doesn't weight much to my total GPA and the exam only takes up 30% of the course, hence I'm not too concerned bout it. Overall, grades aren't too bad and still a few pending results. Just hope i don't screw them up.
Well, the good news first. I have officially been accepted to conduct my internship/thesis with Bosch in Reutlingen, Germany. I don't think I need to intro about Bosch, as everybody knows the company. Yeah the one making drills. Right now my only concern is the visa and hopefully nothing screws me up. I can't tell much about the benefits I'm gonna get, kinda confidential, but i can say Bosch treats even foreigners really damn good!
That's for the good side. The not-so-good side is that, my days in Singapore are almost over for the time being. Been here almost 10 months, and have lots of nostalgic moments and Singapore in general gave me a really good time overall. Read carefully, Singapore as in the country, still have some negatives towards the people here though I have some "good native friends". Shouldn't talk much about them though, some eyes are looking at this post.
Anyway, the Singapore experience. I still remember my first day was kinda screwed up. I took a cheap bus down, and was kinda conned by the bus driver. I don't blame him, i just blame my noobness. I was told to stop at the Singapore immigration as my uncle will come and take me, but i was so tired i slept and when i woke up I asked the bus driver if it's already singapore. He told me yeah yeah! So i took my luggage down and scanned through the passport check, and then called my uncle. Then only to find out that I'm still in Johor, blardy hell! The last time i came to singapore was 2005, and i forgotten we have to go thru 2 customs! lol. wat a way to start!
Then we were scared off by our program director, as he shows the statistics of failure in the past, and some killer subjects, and the intensiveness of this course. And at that moment, I was seriously feared off. You can't blame me for the fear though, as we malaysians are told that the Singapore education standard is super duper high. Additionally, it is a twinning program between Singapore and TUM, one of Germany's elite Uni in Applied Science and Engineering. and then the course started around august. just a few days later, 1 quit the course. Lol! are you shivering already?? lolx!!! that's how i felt and i'm afraid i will be the weakest in class knowing that my classmates are all elite students or experienced worker. One from Intel 3 years exp in US, one 9 years Digital IC Designer, one few years exp in Avago(HP), one already obtained an MBA, and whole list of them. Among the 30 students who enrolled in my class, I guess I'm the only one that graduates from an unknown University in Germany.
Now it came to an end, only 25 students left in my class. And I'm quite at the top average among them though. Felt surprised? I felt surprised too. Let me tell u the reason. NTU standard is pretty low compared to Germany. I don't know if it's higher than Malaysia or not as I've never been into any local uni, but definitely easy to pass. Another reason is that, those who were in the industry before find it difficult to switch back to study mode, especially that the course is running at a fast pace, i.e. 2 weeks lectures, then followed by exam. Of course, other reason do count but if i mention those, you people will think I'm too cocky. But as a matter of fact, I'm just giving my humble judgement. Anyway whatever! My main point is that, some group of people seem strong in the outside, but are actually weak! Some hypocrites in my class, some selfish gangs, and overall sux! The most humble guy in my class is an indonesian and he's the smartest of all i felt. So conclusion is, quality people are humble.
Anyway I still have to work hard for some of those subjects. I remember staying in campus till 11pm everyday in the library or lab just to complete my studies or lab work. I remember we had to pack some canteen food and eat on the bench outside the classroom because the canteen is super packed. Those were the days and i hope it will be behind me from now on.
I have too much to talk about the 10 months here in Singapore. I can't simply type and type as I'm losing my "stamina" too. Anyway, the main part that really made me happy was my baby T's visit to Singapore. The first time was when She came down for Christmas. We went Orchard, Suntec City, Esplanade, City Hall, Raffles Place, Chinese Garden, and many more. Took loads of pictures and was a super damn good trip. It was also our first real trip together overseas. The second visit was a surprise one. She totally caught me about it. She kept it so tight that I can't even feel she's hiding this trip from me. On a Friday night when I was in Chinatown with my college friends having our pre-CNY gathering, suddenly she called and told me that she's reaching soon. I was like, c'mon don't joke with me, and then the happy ending - she was really in Singapore. She got me a padini sling bag, and made me a wonderful valentines card too. We had tony romas for dinner, but this time we didn't tour much. 3rd time visit was in March, and we went to Sentosa Island as our main agenda. Went to the underwater world, and cruise around the beach, was great! I always wanted to walk along the beach with her. The last visit was 2 weeks ago, and we went Universal Studio, which i will post it up soon.
Now that i'm leaving Singapore "soon", I really kinda miss what Singapore have gave me. Maybe I'll do a summary of Singapore soon, again soon. Yeah when i have the mood!
Exam is over. Now, provided i pass every subject, I am left with only one subject, which will commence next week, for another 3 weeks. Then I'm done with all the exams! I mean those technical subject, while there're still some cross discipline module that have to be completed. One of them will be 2moro, but those ar the so-called "bochap" subjects.
Anyway, it was pretty much a boring night for me as exam was over and yet i have nothing to do. No sports, no new movies to watch, and sick of games. I spent most of my time chatting in MSN.
well, facebook is a place where people share their feeling, pass their free time, keep in touch with long lost friends and a place to post up those freaking old school pictures. I was the victim recently where Jason posted up some of those nerdy harry-potter style glasses look which is kinda nice actually to have those flashbacks. But i had much more flashbacks after looking at those pics.
It's obviously related to baby. I freshly remember how we started as it happened during this time around 9 years back. We were in form 4, and we did rancangan membaca together along with another 2 friend. I was surprised that she remembered my bday, and she actually got me a bday present. one and only. well, hard to believe but actually i already had feelings for her for quite a long time, just din't bother to tell anybody except Kel. As there were too many important dates around that period, i prefer to say that it didn't start on a specific day, rather a specific week. but officially, we prefer to have 9th april as our anniversary day, as it was the day where i confessed my feelings for her. But i was quite an idiot to tell her that i was just confessing, but have no intention. Just wanna let her know how i feel. I lied to her. 3 days after, I asked her to be my girlfriend. and the answer was yes. hahhaa..happiest day of my life, at least one of it. The weirdest thing i ever did that day was, saying "thank u thank u" when she agreed to be my gf. She was like, why thank her? she didn't do anything hahaha. Yeah, weird. No more thank u. SUch a geek!
yeah that's bout the beginning of the love story....sweet....
Anyway, it was pretty much a boring night for me as exam was over and yet i have nothing to do. No sports, no new movies to watch, and sick of games. I spent most of my time chatting in MSN.
well, facebook is a place where people share their feeling, pass their free time, keep in touch with long lost friends and a place to post up those freaking old school pictures. I was the victim recently where Jason posted up some of those nerdy harry-potter style glasses look which is kinda nice actually to have those flashbacks. But i had much more flashbacks after looking at those pics.
It's obviously related to baby. I freshly remember how we started as it happened during this time around 9 years back. We were in form 4, and we did rancangan membaca together along with another 2 friend. I was surprised that she remembered my bday, and she actually got me a bday present. one and only. well, hard to believe but actually i already had feelings for her for quite a long time, just din't bother to tell anybody except Kel. As there were too many important dates around that period, i prefer to say that it didn't start on a specific day, rather a specific week. but officially, we prefer to have 9th april as our anniversary day, as it was the day where i confessed my feelings for her. But i was quite an idiot to tell her that i was just confessing, but have no intention. Just wanna let her know how i feel. I lied to her. 3 days after, I asked her to be my girlfriend. and the answer was yes. hahhaa..happiest day of my life, at least one of it. The weirdest thing i ever did that day was, saying "thank u thank u" when she agreed to be my gf. She was like, why thank her? she didn't do anything hahaha. Yeah, weird. No more thank u. SUch a geek!
yeah that's bout the beginning of the love story....sweet....
Valentine came early this year, so as my bday. I took a trip back to KL as it's a public holiday for Good Friday in Singapore. Well, 4 days is relatively short, especially on Saturday I went with parents to pay respect to my late grandfather and uncle in Melacca. So there goes half day, and smoke was all over me. Well, I didn't want to waste my time in KL so I was driving like 140km/h average on the journey back.
Nth much to eleborate about the ching ming. I wanna talk about my birthday celebration.
The best gift, and the most beautiful gift, is spending time with my baby
Nth much to eleborate about the ching ming. I wanna talk about my birthday celebration.
The best gift, and the most beautiful gift, is spending time with my baby
I reached home on thursday night and we had our worse Sushi Zanmai ever since we became regular. Nth to talk about, no pictures either as it wasn't great. The great meal was on Friday. and Thank God it's Friday, so we dine in TGI's Friday in Gardens, midvalley.
Initially our plan was to go to the Korean BBQ House for Bday, but we have a movie to catch so we decided to dine in Midvalley. I was so blur that darling suggested "beer ribeye" and i heard "deer ribeye" Huh? waddahell is deer ribeye lolx. Anyway, food was good. the Beer Ribeye rate 8/10 from my view. Darling's fish wasn't that great though. As for dessert, we went to Paddington's House of Pancake for a nice pancake meal. Great!
Some pics for appreciation.
Then we went on to watch Clash of Titans 3D in Signature Gardens Premier Class. First time in that cinema which wasn't such a pleasant experience and the movie wasn't that great though. Maybe it wasn't meant for 3D.
Here's Mr. and Mrs. Doug in action! lolx
We still manage to get to Korean BBQ House though the next day. Food was good, with Gabriel and newbie Jessie joined us for the meal. Great Company, and had a good laugh. The boss was funny, and it's where we learnt that the sheep escaped, the pig is pregnant and Gabe's crocodile is shy lolx.
After the meal, it's not over yet as Sheng Wa, Dave and Lloyd joined us for starbucks hangout. It's my fave Starbucks outlet in SS2. Gabe treat us all a drink with his Starbucks voucher and that's my Birthday gift from him. Thanks Bro. Jessie, which i knew only that day gave me black forest cake slice for my bday. Thank u...appreciate it.
Thats all for the weekend. As for my birthday gift from darling, it's a real special one. And I love it so much. It's a facial wash set as she know I always lack of confidence due to my face condition. She got me those from Face Shop, and I love it so much. She's such a caring person, OMG I'm so in love with her. She's the best thing ever happen to me.
Its really getting on my nerve already. From my classmates to the strangers, everybody just annoy me with this. THE SILENT MODE!!! More precisely, is the under-use of silent mode of the cellphone. Look, we as engineers spent so much effort to design the ultimate "silent mode" with vibration so that users don't have to turn off their phone yet not disturbing the people around in places where silence is gold. For example when u're in a bus where most of us would love to have a nice peaceful sleep, and u can contact whoever via sms and all u need is just an effortless act to keep ur phone silent. For nokia(and i believe for other as well), all u need to do is hold ur hash key for 3 seconds and wallaaaa, it's silent. Hey idiots!!! Do u know the vibration come from a transformer inside ur phone which is few times the size of the core of the phone, which is the microcontroller. without the transformer, your phone can even be the size of your thumb idiot!!! so, please appreciate the vibration mode and silent mode by using it appropriately!!!
It's just so annoying, same as some of my classmates, who themselves are engineers but just don't know how to turn to silent mode during classes. It's not accidentally or what, this people just so inconsiderate!!
Thats it, my goal now is to invent a silent mode detector, and install them on places like bus or cinema. It detects devices which are not in silence, and send an intensify signal to the phone, and when the power of the signal is so great and keep amplifying, it will heat up the battery and eventually blow the phone up! If the phone owner is lucky, he'll just have to buy a new phone. If not, RIP!!!! FUCK!!!! I AM SICK OF U!!! DON"T MESS WITH ENGINEERS!
It's all about badminton these days for me in Singapore. Just like the good old days in Kuen Cheng Primary Skul. well after going thru a 12 years cycle I am slowly discovering my badminton passion and form again.
Today I had a 1 hour game and it was a sudden plan to have badminton. I was kinda lucky to be able to book a court last minute though only 1 hour slot left. And it was such a rush as we finish lecture at 3.20pm and only have bout 40 minutes to get home, get my rackets and accessories, and rush to the court. Was late by about 10 minutes but since we're playing singles today so it's not a big deal to lose 10 minutes as we old folks will get tired in no time.
Being there first, I was stretching, and waiting for my friend to arrive. A group of youngsters, in their secondary skul level, wanted to play with me as they spotted a golden opportunity to play despite not having a court. Well initially it was me playing with 2 fellas while the 3rd guy just sat on the bench. When my friend arrive, we played doubles and we won one match lost one. After that it was purely singles and the bencher came in to play.
I stroke with him first, and then we play match. Wow, i discovered that I am way amateur compare to him. The game lasted only around 20 mins and I lost 21-4 21-8. Kena tapao!. Haha, only soon to learn that he represented Singapore before in youth tournaments. I was like woosh!!! No wonder. And he's freaking damn humble! Good kid and he ask for a next game sometime next week. Woosh, cool. this time I am not gonna get beaten with that score.
Of course the scoreline doesn't need to be this way though the outcome will still be the same. I will definitely lose to him but i lost badly because i was in serious fatigue today and still feeling pain on my left knee, not to mention my broken toe nail i got from last few weeks that hasn't fully recovered. Yes, it is an excuse, but i am proud to be a loser as I've lost to someone more talented and energetic.
Badminton Rox!
Today I had a 1 hour game and it was a sudden plan to have badminton. I was kinda lucky to be able to book a court last minute though only 1 hour slot left. And it was such a rush as we finish lecture at 3.20pm and only have bout 40 minutes to get home, get my rackets and accessories, and rush to the court. Was late by about 10 minutes but since we're playing singles today so it's not a big deal to lose 10 minutes as we old folks will get tired in no time.
Being there first, I was stretching, and waiting for my friend to arrive. A group of youngsters, in their secondary skul level, wanted to play with me as they spotted a golden opportunity to play despite not having a court. Well initially it was me playing with 2 fellas while the 3rd guy just sat on the bench. When my friend arrive, we played doubles and we won one match lost one. After that it was purely singles and the bencher came in to play.
I stroke with him first, and then we play match. Wow, i discovered that I am way amateur compare to him. The game lasted only around 20 mins and I lost 21-4 21-8. Kena tapao!. Haha, only soon to learn that he represented Singapore before in youth tournaments. I was like woosh!!! No wonder. And he's freaking damn humble! Good kid and he ask for a next game sometime next week. Woosh, cool. this time I am not gonna get beaten with that score.
Of course the scoreline doesn't need to be this way though the outcome will still be the same. I will definitely lose to him but i lost badly because i was in serious fatigue today and still feeling pain on my left knee, not to mention my broken toe nail i got from last few weeks that hasn't fully recovered. Yes, it is an excuse, but i am proud to be a loser as I've lost to someone more talented and energetic.
Badminton Rox!
I guess its impossible to escape from this topic, which is why in the title i put a number 1 there as it will have more on this.
Most of my classmates be it in Germany or in Singapore thinks that i have the money to spend just because I'm abroad. Let me tell u what, those who know me well will know that I'm not rich neither is my family. Both my parents are teachers, which are government servant, which as all of u know in our country the pay is very low. Yes I stayed in a condo, not because my parents want a luxurious life, but due to a series of house break-in and nearly cause the life of my dad, they decided to get a low-cost condominium. But low-cost condominium is not so low cost actually, as have to pay maintainence every month which is not cheap at all. Yes, it doesn't guarantee a better safety, but at least through statistics it is safer than terrace house.
As for the studying aboard part, most of them think my parents have the money since both my bro and I studied abroad. But u must know, my parents sacrifice all their income for our education. As they are teachers and they way they were brought up, the primary priority is education. The dumped all the money in our education, which is why i am still capable of studying in Singapore now. My bro is slightly better as he is smart and hard working, able to reduce the burden by getting scholarship. I am not so capable, and not so hard working but still doing well in my studies to ensure that my parents money are not wasted.
Thats us, so please people change your perspective on me! I am not RICH at all. I do have a couple of "expensive" gadgets such as my earphone and that is because i save up by having less outings and food. I am given a fixed pocket money per month to spend, and i dont spend all as i will save up for all these once in a bluemoon.
Some people don't have the money, but they want to spend on all these. They take from parents, which they over estimated the parent's saving and income. Of course, parents love their kids nowadays that they are just willing to squeeze all their money to buy iphone for their kids. Nothing wrong with loving your kids. But the thing is, by spending on all these luxurious goodies, it will soon develop a habit among the kids. One day, they will have to be independent and then they will start spending in debts.
Car is another issue. I don't blame Malaysians for having the mind set that they need to get a car as soon as they work, and get foreign made car as we know what kinda quality it is to have a local made. Second hand car is even worse. But sometimes, what you need doesn't mean you can have. This is where u have to start thinking of your capabilities. Who wouldn't like to have a conviniency? But the world is like that, like it or not. If you can't afford it why force the way out???
I am not critisizing anyone in particular or what. These are all collection of experience with people around me and their story, from all different ages and different background. Money is always gonna be an issue no matter how rich u are coz u will spend even more when ur rich until u reach ur limit. But just be careful where you spend on. Be aware what you're capable of. I don't think you need an iphone to survive in this world.
Most of my classmates be it in Germany or in Singapore thinks that i have the money to spend just because I'm abroad. Let me tell u what, those who know me well will know that I'm not rich neither is my family. Both my parents are teachers, which are government servant, which as all of u know in our country the pay is very low. Yes I stayed in a condo, not because my parents want a luxurious life, but due to a series of house break-in and nearly cause the life of my dad, they decided to get a low-cost condominium. But low-cost condominium is not so low cost actually, as have to pay maintainence every month which is not cheap at all. Yes, it doesn't guarantee a better safety, but at least through statistics it is safer than terrace house.
As for the studying aboard part, most of them think my parents have the money since both my bro and I studied abroad. But u must know, my parents sacrifice all their income for our education. As they are teachers and they way they were brought up, the primary priority is education. The dumped all the money in our education, which is why i am still capable of studying in Singapore now. My bro is slightly better as he is smart and hard working, able to reduce the burden by getting scholarship. I am not so capable, and not so hard working but still doing well in my studies to ensure that my parents money are not wasted.
Thats us, so please people change your perspective on me! I am not RICH at all. I do have a couple of "expensive" gadgets such as my earphone and that is because i save up by having less outings and food. I am given a fixed pocket money per month to spend, and i dont spend all as i will save up for all these once in a bluemoon.
Some people don't have the money, but they want to spend on all these. They take from parents, which they over estimated the parent's saving and income. Of course, parents love their kids nowadays that they are just willing to squeeze all their money to buy iphone for their kids. Nothing wrong with loving your kids. But the thing is, by spending on all these luxurious goodies, it will soon develop a habit among the kids. One day, they will have to be independent and then they will start spending in debts.
Car is another issue. I don't blame Malaysians for having the mind set that they need to get a car as soon as they work, and get foreign made car as we know what kinda quality it is to have a local made. Second hand car is even worse. But sometimes, what you need doesn't mean you can have. This is where u have to start thinking of your capabilities. Who wouldn't like to have a conviniency? But the world is like that, like it or not. If you can't afford it why force the way out???
I am not critisizing anyone in particular or what. These are all collection of experience with people around me and their story, from all different ages and different background. Money is always gonna be an issue no matter how rich u are coz u will spend even more when ur rich until u reach ur limit. But just be careful where you spend on. Be aware what you're capable of. I don't think you need an iphone to survive in this world.
Muahahahaha, I spend so much time reviving this blog with the new layout and stuff, but i didn't update much lolx...
hahaha and i see spammers are getting more and more these days, well i thank them for spending their time spamming blogs eventhough i noe most of them come from adware and viruses.
anyway this post won't be long either as i just wanna tell u guys that i'm still pretty much alive and living life to the fullest....but of coz now its more like 90% studies and 10% slacking....so nothing much to live life max....
I'll be Back!
hahaha and i see spammers are getting more and more these days, well i thank them for spending their time spamming blogs eventhough i noe most of them come from adware and viruses.
anyway this post won't be long either as i just wanna tell u guys that i'm still pretty much alive and living life to the fullest....but of coz now its more like 90% studies and 10% slacking....so nothing much to live life max....
I'll be Back!
Just came back from a tiring but great badminton game with uncle. Sigh, I am too old for these shit. Now feel pain everywhere. That's sports btw, no pain no gain.
Just b4 i need to head back to the "Gym" to workout my brain, i decided to spend some time uploading my music player. Well initially i'm not so keen, but i guess it's a good way to express my feelings via music. Don't have any song yet, just one. it's the one where i pasted the lyrics. lol
will update as soon as i finish my exams...
Just b4 i need to head back to the "Gym" to workout my brain, i decided to spend some time uploading my music player. Well initially i'm not so keen, but i guess it's a good way to express my feelings via music. Don't have any song yet, just one. it's the one where i pasted the lyrics. lol
will update as soon as i finish my exams...
Well, after the surrogate post, I decided to unveil some of mine in recent weeks. Things ain't going too well for me for the past few weeks. First it's my Analog Design lab assignment. it has been up and down. Lesson learn from this lab, is that you can't get perfect design. My advice as an IC Designer to all of you electronics out there, please don't put your life all on electronics, as they're never perfect though they're pretty advance now. Look at how toyota fall, good example.
Then my internship is kinda still hanging too. I had 2 interview, one which i really hope to get, failed to get and the other one no news yet. But I'm not worried bout it yet as I have still time to apply for one, and many other options throughout the world. Worst case is that i do my internship for free. So not to worry bout that.
As for my relationship, it has been in da downstream since after our pre-valentine celebration. We have been fighting for over small matters and it exploded. Almost killed our relationship. Now have left a big gap in between us. At least it had been settled and now we're in a recovery stage. Hopefully things will get better and nothing goes wrong again. Nevertheless, whatever happen to us or no matter how we curse each other, She's still the sweetest thing on earth. She's still the best thing that ever happen to me.
I was browsing our old pics, and I decided to post this up just to remind both of us that we've came a long long way back, and it would be a waste to throw everything away. More or less 8 years on and off we've been together, man.....thats long. the journey ahead is even longer, so don't give up baby.....
btw, this pic was a collage of our outing during my 2 months return to malaysia during summer 2006. She gets prettier as time goes by....
I always love to reflect movies with our own life. Of course alot of movie are inspired from our daily life, and some of them are based on true story. Naturally, to attract viewers, movies tend to exaggerate until a certain extend it is just too fake. Nontheless, you can still get some moral from movies.
I bet most of you have watched Surrogates. If you don't, i won't tell you the story as it will be like spoilers. It's a sci-fi and the summary is that people in the future can have their own surrogate, which is like an AI which looks exactly like human, and you sorta control it to do your daily routine. No supernatural power, just human. Of coz the advantage is that you won't get hurt since it's not ur real body.
The settings of surrogate might seem to be somewhere in the future, but i can tell you it's around us already. In fact everyone you see is a surrogate. Nobody is real nowadays. It's no longer a question of whether a person is wearing mask from his/her true identity or not, it's now the matter of how many layers.
Well, from my point of view, this "surrogates" has its bright side too. At least you can use it to camouflage your weaknesses in this cunning and cruel society, where only the strong one survives. As i believe everyone has their weak spot. A strong person is those who are good in hiding their weakness.
But i felt, the ugly truth of coz, is that surrogates has more ugly side than bright side. All those fake smiles, fake promises, fake compliment, it's just ugly and disgusting.
I bet most of you have watched Surrogates. If you don't, i won't tell you the story as it will be like spoilers. It's a sci-fi and the summary is that people in the future can have their own surrogate, which is like an AI which looks exactly like human, and you sorta control it to do your daily routine. No supernatural power, just human. Of coz the advantage is that you won't get hurt since it's not ur real body.
The settings of surrogate might seem to be somewhere in the future, but i can tell you it's around us already. In fact everyone you see is a surrogate. Nobody is real nowadays. It's no longer a question of whether a person is wearing mask from his/her true identity or not, it's now the matter of how many layers.
Well, from my point of view, this "surrogates" has its bright side too. At least you can use it to camouflage your weaknesses in this cunning and cruel society, where only the strong one survives. As i believe everyone has their weak spot. A strong person is those who are good in hiding their weakness.
But i felt, the ugly truth of coz, is that surrogates has more ugly side than bright side. All those fake smiles, fake promises, fake compliment, it's just ugly and disgusting.
星星閃 天空掛 它肯跟你回家
金光閃 心中掛 它可使你成家
山邊的鮮花 多姿多彩你愛嘛
它肯跟你回家 你怕硬幣很腥嘛
偏卻需要它
何時才挨完寒酸的身世 (你 如何換季)
冇冷氣要靠爛破風扇代替 (nononono……)
情在兩百呎空間發揮 但願別逼到下世
要兩老安居需要實際 (請你忍耐到底)
我有野心升職再上位 找生計
誰能避免講錢錢啊錢缺錢不可以 (才能活到寫意)
我需要新生活為孩子 (一世也有開支)
還天天洗腦聽了豪宅廣告千次
money 能鼓舞大志 money 會一世相依
勤勞賣力照顧老闆 故意加班放棄了玩
金睛火眼關注金價只要未盲
橫財利大那裡算貪 到處兼職放棄午
休息不計多與少財路多多可當老闆
講錢錢啊錢難道可天賜 看指數飆升百病能醫 (錢會照顧身子)
誰清高不說錢啊錢可搬到公廁
money 誰都說願意 money 名譽靠你去開始
貪多一點炒多一點追多一點渣多一點沽多一點搶多半個仙
爭多一點威多一點奸多一點險多一點賭多一點將分秒變錢
搏殺哪管得太多 (從前未好過) 現在誰斗膽去管我
建立王國無盡擴展大突破
很多人都讚我 (都怕我) 也附和 (要附和)
討教我 (討厭我) 要道賀 (要道賀)
務必要想要將要即要多到比那首富更加多……
講錢因有錢我更加得志 (誰助你去展翅)
我早已愛上數字
(You're such a fool such a such a fool)
財產多多到失去唯一的你 my dear money 回不到上次
lalalalalala…… 停下會掛念 那一天
背著面 你遂件 將衫褲晾遍 難遇見
你說我已變到不可一世 更說你吻我亦會感到忌畏
然後我 吃不到你手藝 望著大屋過份美麗
更怕我公司出了問題
我有我孤單焦慮到底 留下我獻世
誰能避免講錢錢啊錢缺錢不可以 (原為了更寫意)
我心重千斤卻為銀紙 (如像愛 未能買到天意)
誰都知這照妖鏡照出虛構真摯
money 難收買睡意
money 難收買情意
money ……… 會迷惑宗旨
you can't find any better song that describe the world now. Sadly, though i am quite good in enduring the ugly side of life, this issue is one thing i can't really get it.
Btw, if you wanna know my opinion on money, i'll expose it.
Money, to me it's important. One of the top in my priority list, but definitely won't shape the way i live my life.
I prefer to live happily even if I have to sacrifice lots of money. I felt it's a good trade off.
金光閃 心中掛 它可使你成家
山邊的鮮花 多姿多彩你愛嘛
它肯跟你回家 你怕硬幣很腥嘛
偏卻需要它
何時才挨完寒酸的身世 (你 如何換季)
冇冷氣要靠爛破風扇代替 (nononono……)
情在兩百呎空間發揮 但願別逼到下世
要兩老安居需要實際 (請你忍耐到底)
我有野心升職再上位 找生計
誰能避免講錢錢啊錢缺錢不可以 (才能活到寫意)
我需要新生活為孩子 (一世也有開支)
還天天洗腦聽了豪宅廣告千次
money 能鼓舞大志 money 會一世相依
勤勞賣力照顧老闆 故意加班放棄了玩
金睛火眼關注金價只要未盲
橫財利大那裡算貪 到處兼職放棄午
休息不計多與少財路多多可當老闆
講錢錢啊錢難道可天賜 看指數飆升百病能醫 (錢會照顧身子)
誰清高不說錢啊錢可搬到公廁
money 誰都說願意 money 名譽靠你去開始
貪多一點炒多一點追多一點渣多一點沽多一點搶多半個仙
爭多一點威多一點奸多一點險多一點賭多一點將分秒變錢
搏殺哪管得太多 (從前未好過) 現在誰斗膽去管我
建立王國無盡擴展大突破
很多人都讚我 (都怕我) 也附和 (要附和)
討教我 (討厭我) 要道賀 (要道賀)
務必要想要將要即要多到比那首富更加多……
講錢因有錢我更加得志 (誰助你去展翅)
我早已愛上數字
(You're such a fool such a such a fool)
財產多多到失去唯一的你 my dear money 回不到上次
lalalalalala…… 停下會掛念 那一天
背著面 你遂件 將衫褲晾遍 難遇見
你說我已變到不可一世 更說你吻我亦會感到忌畏
然後我 吃不到你手藝 望著大屋過份美麗
更怕我公司出了問題
我有我孤單焦慮到底 留下我獻世
誰能避免講錢錢啊錢缺錢不可以 (原為了更寫意)
我心重千斤卻為銀紙 (如像愛 未能買到天意)
誰都知這照妖鏡照出虛構真摯
money 難收買睡意
money 難收買情意
money ……… 會迷惑宗旨
you can't find any better song that describe the world now. Sadly, though i am quite good in enduring the ugly side of life, this issue is one thing i can't really get it.
Btw, if you wanna know my opinion on money, i'll expose it.
Money, to me it's important. One of the top in my priority list, but definitely won't shape the way i live my life.
I prefer to live happily even if I have to sacrifice lots of money. I felt it's a good trade off.
Well, CNY wasn't much to talk about as this year was quite similar to what was last year, except the tone has been much quieter. I didn't even bother to go for deco snapshots as I am a lil disappointed at it in Melaka.
Anyway, the best part of the trip was the journey to and flo.
Let me define 2 very important parameters(in layman terms) : -
1.) Velocity(Speed) - how fast you are going at a long run.
2.) Acceleration - how fast you can achieve different speed
As you all probably know, my uncle has a Honda Accord EuroR edition, something you probably don't see in Malaysia, but quite a number of it in Singapore. First thing I notice is that the car has 6 gear transmission, but can only rav up to 180km/h according to the speedometer. Hmm, a 2.0 liter sports edition car only @ 180? it's kinda wrong. My Iswaralution can hit 200 max, before engine blow of course.
My uncle decided this time to go slow initially, as he doesn't wanna donate coffee to our Royal Police Department. Of course, there was a lil heavy traffic around Johor area and that adds the reason why he go kinda slow(110km/h). But along the way itself he's been tailgating and cutting left and right for a faster lane.
Then after about half hour stuck in those heavy traffic, then it goes smooth all the way and finally my uncle is fed up staying at his speed. Here we go. from 6th gear down to 3rd gear, the engine bursting sound and the sound of an acceleration. U gotta admit, though it's kinda "family saloon sports edition" Accord EuroR has a great acceleration, though it doesn't not have much of a speed. I would say it's a perfect car for roads in Malaysia and Singapore where u can achieve much in speed but i u can definitely need good acceleration to overtake tortoise kancil which has a big muffler but only fart without speed.
Well it's definitely a honda to look forward too.
The journey back was kinda similar except i manage to sleep half of the journey as i was kinda sick. I woke up only when my uncle starts shifting gears rapidly and overtaking cars. And I was lucky to wake up on time. What stole the show was this black horse
Of coz this picture was taken from google image. The one i saw was far more stylish as it was carbon-fibered body. This car have both acceleration and speed. Judging by the way he breaks, it should be an automatic car. Well of coz most of malaysian luxurious cars are automatic transmission. But u just can't see the effect of an automatic gear at all. It accelerate so smoothly. I was looking at my uncle's meter @ 160km/h but can still see this black horse drifting apart by split of second. About 3-4 seconds later, you can't even see the smoke from this car anymore. It's crazily powerful and fast.
It is now my Number 1 dream car!!
I am blardy hell Moody and sick!
I've been too arrogant of myself these days. I thought I was at the peak of everything, but only to realize that it's just a temporary throne. Now I've been thrown out of it!
Now I'm bearing the pain! I am so so stuck with life at this point.
It's another 2 weeks to exams. I have not completed my lab assignment. I am down with flu and I don't know how healthy I am to study. Damn it. I am emo, real emo!
I want to get something, but i just cant afford it!!!
I've been too arrogant of myself these days. I thought I was at the peak of everything, but only to realize that it's just a temporary throne. Now I've been thrown out of it!
Now I'm bearing the pain! I am so so stuck with life at this point.
It's another 2 weeks to exams. I have not completed my lab assignment. I am down with flu and I don't know how healthy I am to study. Damn it. I am emo, real emo!
I want to get something, but i just cant afford it!!!
How do you measure success? What is success? Success in what?
Chicken or Egg, Egg or Chicken, scientific explanation? or philosophical explanation?
There are questions and questions surrounding us, and some questions are always in running in circles, where the head is the tail and vice versa. So, now, is there a way to quantify those? Is there an absolute yes or no to those?
I like this so called "matrix of knowledge". It splits to four parts.
1.) The "known knowns" - which means, the thing that you already know and it's known.
2.) The "known unknowns" - the things that you know it exist, but you just don't know what it is.
3.) The "unknown knowns" - something you don't know but it is there.
4.) The "unknown unknowns" -things that you don't know and you don't even know that you don't know.
lolx, sounds abit difficult. But sadly it's fair to say that most of us are having more "unknowns unknowns". What we know is just so little, that most of the time we set an approximation or confidence level of acceptance.
In digital world, there are in general two values - the "ones" and "zeroes". But as an engineer, we know that there are no "absolute ones" or "absolute zeroes". When i studied science during my younger times, I always think that everything can be proven scientifically has an absolute "yes" or "no". At this Masters level, I start to realize that alot of things around us are just purely an approximation or in other words, a human self-defined "yes" or "no".
So you think it's exactly 4 o clock on 13th February 2010? what is 4 o clock? what is 4? what is o clock? is time absolute??!!!!
Think about it......
Chicken or Egg, Egg or Chicken, scientific explanation? or philosophical explanation?
There are questions and questions surrounding us, and some questions are always in running in circles, where the head is the tail and vice versa. So, now, is there a way to quantify those? Is there an absolute yes or no to those?
I like this so called "matrix of knowledge". It splits to four parts.
1.) The "known knowns" - which means, the thing that you already know and it's known.
2.) The "known unknowns" - the things that you know it exist, but you just don't know what it is.
3.) The "unknown knowns" - something you don't know but it is there.
4.) The "unknown unknowns" -things that you don't know and you don't even know that you don't know.
lolx, sounds abit difficult. But sadly it's fair to say that most of us are having more "unknowns unknowns". What we know is just so little, that most of the time we set an approximation or confidence level of acceptance.
In digital world, there are in general two values - the "ones" and "zeroes". But as an engineer, we know that there are no "absolute ones" or "absolute zeroes". When i studied science during my younger times, I always think that everything can be proven scientifically has an absolute "yes" or "no". At this Masters level, I start to realize that alot of things around us are just purely an approximation or in other words, a human self-defined "yes" or "no".
So you think it's exactly 4 o clock on 13th February 2010? what is 4 o clock? what is 4? what is o clock? is time absolute??!!!!
Think about it......
I hate valentine all this years as I don't usually get to celebrate them with anyone special. This year was so different. I had probably one of the best valentines day though it hasn't reach yet.
On a fine Friday evening where I was with SJ4Pians in Chinatown to do a pre-CNY gathering, and while I was busy scooping Tom Yam and Grilled sting ray, suddenly my phone call rings.
*on the phone display -- Terrene Baby*
Me : Yes darling, you're home already?
T : Ya, are you free to talk?
Me : Well I am outside but yeah i guess so. Why?
T : Nothing la, i will ttyl.
Me : No tell me why? Are you Emo?
T : Yeah sort of, but tell you later.
Me : *don't wanna push it too much* Ok dear will call you later.
Around 5 mins later, phone ring again. was abit like aiyo wat again?
Me : Yes darling?
T : Later how you go home?
Me : Erm, MRT lo.
T : which station? change at Outram Park to EW line right?
Me : yeah why?
T : coz i'll be reaching Harbourfront soon.
Me : Darling are you crazy? what are you talking bout??
T : Aiyo, I'm in Singapore la.
Me : haha don't joke.
T : haha surprise!!
Me : ish you arrr *heart melted*, k i will come pick u up. Call me when you reach k?
T : k see u later.
Man, it was the best valentines gift ever! And so I picked her up from Harbourfront and headed back to Chinatown as i wanna meet another friend of mine. After a while, we both went back to my area to have a very good teochew porridge for dinner/supper.
She came with a backpack and a gift. It's the Padini bag that i was eyeing on since before Christmas.
On top of that, she made a valentines card for me. Gosh I love DIY! Oh I mean I love the things that she DIY for me lolx. Take a look at it, isn't the most beautiful thing on earth??!!
And the valentines dinner....TONY ROMAS PORK RiBs and RiBeyes!!
and here's a thank kew kiss for my darling, who put so much effort on it.
I love you.
She's the sweetest thing on earth!!!!
On a fine Friday evening where I was with SJ4Pians in Chinatown to do a pre-CNY gathering, and while I was busy scooping Tom Yam and Grilled sting ray, suddenly my phone call rings.
*on the phone display -- Terrene Baby*
Me : Yes darling, you're home already?
T : Ya, are you free to talk?
Me : Well I am outside but yeah i guess so. Why?
T : Nothing la, i will ttyl.
Me : No tell me why? Are you Emo?
T : Yeah sort of, but tell you later.
Me : *don't wanna push it too much* Ok dear will call you later.
Around 5 mins later, phone ring again. was abit like aiyo wat again?
Me : Yes darling?
T : Later how you go home?
Me : Erm, MRT lo.
T : which station? change at Outram Park to EW line right?
Me : yeah why?
T : coz i'll be reaching Harbourfront soon.
Me : Darling are you crazy? what are you talking bout??
T : Aiyo, I'm in Singapore la.
Me : haha don't joke.
T : haha surprise!!
Me : ish you arrr *heart melted*, k i will come pick u up. Call me when you reach k?
T : k see u later.
Man, it was the best valentines gift ever! And so I picked her up from Harbourfront and headed back to Chinatown as i wanna meet another friend of mine. After a while, we both went back to my area to have a very good teochew porridge for dinner/supper.
She came with a backpack and a gift. It's the Padini bag that i was eyeing on since before Christmas.
On top of that, she made a valentines card for me. Gosh I love DIY! Oh I mean I love the things that she DIY for me lolx. Take a look at it, isn't the most beautiful thing on earth??!!
And the valentines dinner....TONY ROMAS PORK RiBs and RiBeyes!!
and here's a thank kew kiss for my darling, who put so much effort on it.
I love you.
She's the sweetest thing on earth!!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)